What did 0 say to 8? Nice belt

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two elderly men were sitting in the sun discussing their lives. The first man says "my life was horrible as I had to walk to work uphill in the snow with no boots on a daily basis" The second man looks at the first and replies "you know why my life was horrible?.. I was born a jewish man in Germany during the second world war and was injustly judged and harrassed nearly to death on a daily basis"

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guess what? What? you have to guess...your mama

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I'm Donald Trump! Wump wump wump!

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Whats the difference between a trampoline and a pile of dead babies? Ones fun to jump on, the others just a trampoline.

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ROSS G IS OBESE

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Why did the child get cancer? Because there was a family history of it.

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What does an eagle and a worm have in common? They both live in the ground. Except the eagle.

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yo mamma's so stupid, she is not that smart.

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What did the watermelon say to the apple? Nothing. Watermelons are fruits and incapable of speech.

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What do dogs and cats have in common? They eat dog food, accept for the cat.

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Why did it take so long for the baby's to paint my wall? I didn't throw them hard enough.

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Q:If pigs ever played basketball, then what sound would they make? A:Oink-oink

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How do you kill a blond? Well there are many ways the most effiont way is to shoot them

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A black guy walks into a bar... he sits down and has a drink

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How its supposed to go: Knock knock Who's there? I eat mop. I eat mopwho? How my friend Cassidy did it: Knock knock Who's there? I eat my poo! Oh wait I screwed up.

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Where do black people get there hair cut? At a hairdresser.

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What's red and has a mask ? Blood, I lied about the mask.

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what did the smoker say to the doctor? nothing she died of lung cancer.

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Why is it incorrect that the universe will end in 2012? Because profound idiocy doesn't always occur.

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What do you call a seven foot Egyptian named Randy who trains leopards to uproot floral cactuses? Randy.

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Michael Brown

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Why did little Suzy fall off the swing? She didn't have arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Suzy.

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George Michael walks into a bathrom.....

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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