Why did Jimmy fall off his bike? He had no arms… Why did he have no arms? Jimmy was a potato

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A little boy started choking on a condom. His father came and was in a great panic. "Please don't leave me. I don't want to lose you!" he cried over and over again. Then his wife came in and said "it's alright darling, there's plenty more in the drawer". "Oh, thank God for that, I thought I lost it there!" dad replied.

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The daring man said "here goes nothing." And nothing happened. -Tag

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how do make you a child cry? break his fingers

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Question: What did one lesbian say to the other lesbian at the grocery store? Answer: Will that be paper or plastic?

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What's Pink And Fluffy? Pink Fluff.

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What is a Mexican's favorite sport? Cross country.

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Why was the man cold? Because he was dead.

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69

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple Finding multiple worms in your apple

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A dog goes to his food bowl. He eats his dinner.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I dream of a day when chickens won't be questioned about their actions

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What's sad about the Holocaust? well i don't know ,it may or may not have anything to do with you and cause absolutely no sad emotions toward the subject. I for one don't care.........

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A duck walk into a bar and asks the bartender for a drink. The bartender hands him a glass and the duck drinks it. After finishing his drink he ruminates about how drowning his misery with booze won't solve a thing in his life. He decided he'll call his ex-wife and apologize and goes back home.

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There are four worms walking in a straight line. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The fourth worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied!

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Three men walk into a bar, they are promptly served and then they go home. Later that evening the bartender closes the bar and goes upstairs to his apartment where he is struggling with his debt... Business hasn't been as good these days.

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Roses are red Violets are blue your mum went to the loo and out came you

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Why did Timmy fall off the swings? -Because he had no arms Knock knock! Who's there? Not Timmy

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What did T Pain say to the skipper of his yacht? I'm on a yacht

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Guess how old my lil bro is...Well your wrong cause he's dead.

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There are two hippopotamus' in a pond cooling off from the hot day. One is named Nathaniel IV and the other Timothy. Timothy asks Nathaniel, "Nathaniel, what day is it today?" Nathaniel then replies," I believe it is Tuesday." Timothy is taken back then replies," How odd. I could've sworn it was Wednesday."

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot, racist.

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Your mother is so fat........... that she is morbidly obese and is at severe risk for diabetes and other weight related diseases.

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Your mother is so old that she is dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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