Why did Hanna fall of the swing She had no arms or legs Knock knock Whose there Not Hanna Haha

So. The gays. ...

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Nematode's. A Nematode is a type of round worm that lives under water, and while most are carnivorous, some feed on vegetation, such as pineapples.

Luckily Captain America was able to rescue Hitler just before he was trapped in the ice for many years... Thanks to his brave efforts the war continued many more years! Captain America under ice: Why do I get the feeling I did something wrong? Hmm... 30 years later Cap: DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMNNNNNN!!!!!! Moral: On ice, tickets sold out... no clothing required, ladies only, None under 16!

"My foot is killing me" "no, actually it's that noose around your neck"

what do you get when you combine a cat and a dog? nothing since it is impossible to combine a cat and a dog

Why did Sally fall off of the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock. Whose there? Not Sally.

Your mom is so fat that she is at risk for type two diabetes.

How do you know if a Frenchman has been in your house? You could ask a neighbor, or check to see if anything has been missing, or set up a camera. There are actually many ways.

why do elephants eat peanuts? so they can save the wrappers for valuable prizes

what is sad about gingers ? they are an unrecognised visible minority.

what did batman say to robin before they got into the batmibile "get in the batmoblie"

What's worse than standing in line at Walmart? Being raped. What's worse than paying an outrageous amount for whatever it is you bought at Walmart? Being pregnant with a rape baby.

What do Molly and Sharon have in common? They both annoy me.

What did God say to the snake when the Snake decided to ignore God and just give Eve the apples? Snake what are you doing? Answer me, SNAKE! SNAAAAAAAAAAAAAKE! *DUN DUN DURUDUN! DU DU DUN! *gunshot* Moral: I just hate thumbs ups, and the comments where I omit this receives those horrible green thumbs instead of them sexy red ones, so there goes.

How did the blind man know when to open his parachute when he went skydiving? The leash went slack.

What did the blanket say when it fell off the bed Nothing it is a sentient object and doesn't have the capability to talk

What did the midget get for Christmas? A new watch and a gift card for Applebee's.

What's the difference between a girl's mouth and her vagina? There is none. I want my penis to be inside both of those things.

what did Santa say to the 3 hookers? Merry Christmas!

if life gives you lemons you probably have problems

Woman's rights.

9001

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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