What's worse than a 15 year old getting hit by a car? Adam Johnson

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A doctor, a farmer, and a blonde walk into a bar. The doctor orders red wine because he knows it's good for the heart. The farmer orders a Piña Colada because he likes fruit. The two men wait eagerly to what the blonde is about to order. The blonde opens her purse and says "Damn it, I can't find my credit card." Suddenly, a handsome young gentleman walks up to her says "Don't worry miss, I'll buy a drink for you. What are you having?" The blonde looks up and says "Don't worry? I just lost my credit card!" In a fit a of anger, the blonde storms out the bar and doesn't order anything.

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Why did Suzy fall of the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Suzy.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs on the front porch? Matt What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a hole? Phil What do you call a man with no arms and no legs floating down the river? Bob

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Q. why was Martin Luther King assassinated? A. he wasn't his son was

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends on how hard you throw them

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how do you wake lady gaga up? you punch-her-face

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A horse cantered into a bar.

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I once went seven years without sex, then I turned eight and my uncle raped me.

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An Asian walks out of the library.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the same wolf that had devoured the chickens' chicks singlehandedly was chasing it.

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Penis

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A man who can't spell walks into an Arab.

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Q:why did the boy fall off the swing A:he had no arms Q:why couldn't he get up A:he had no legs Q:why did he die A:he fell in a puddle

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Why didn't the 13 year old Black boy have any friends? He was autistic and didn't connect properly with people.

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What's 1+1? Window! Just kidding it's 2.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new girlfriend? Neither has he.

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what's black and blue and has red all over it? A dead body ^_^

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Do you have liquid tape? No ( But he really did)

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two guys walk into a bar. the third guy ducks

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Why were the black man's balls so big He had testicular cancer

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Why did the rabbit cross the road? I don't know, I was asking you.

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My penis is small, Just kidding, it's huge.

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THIS IS NOT SPARTA! *pulls him out of the hole*

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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