Why could the girl climb out of the pool? She drowned

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whats orange, nocturnal, and hurts to the touch? The sun or an orange owl... Depends on your preference

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Why could the red-haired boy sing higher notes than the blonde-haired boy? He was castrated at birth.

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How do you make a clown sad? You hit him in the face with axe

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roses are red i have a phone nobody texts me forever alonee lol

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Who can make 50 iPads in 1 hour? An Asian

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Three women are on an airplane. One's a blonde, one's a redhead, and one's a brunette. Unfortunately, the plane was going to crash and there was nothing they could do but jump out and parachute to safety. So the captain said to each of the three ladies, "You can only take one of your possessions when you parachute out of the plane." The blonde says "I will take my watch becau--" But before she could finish her sentence the plane exploded because the flames on the wing had ignited the fuel tank. No one survived.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Seven was an identity thief.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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If John has 50 candy bars and eats 45, how many does he have? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

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I walked into a bar and it hurt because it was metal

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Q: Who are the fastest readers? A: 9/11 jumpers 200 stories in 5 seconds

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5

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There was a peice of lasagna. He knew he tasted great. So he constantly feared for his life.

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How is butter and your mom similar? They both consist of much fat.

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What did 0 say to 8? Nice belt

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You know what big feet mean? Big socks

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Whats cooler than cool? Ice Cold.

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What is the difference between a rock and a pencil? Your Mom.

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two biscuits rolling down a hill one says, " where you from" the other replied "im not telling you, youl steal my washing"

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What did the father say to his gay son? "Finish your homework."

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, The Holocaust. And also cancer.

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A man met a genie that granted him three wishes. I wish I could fly. The genie gave him a plane ticket. No, I want to really fly for real! The genie put him inside a plane. Okay, I wish I was unable to die then! The genie killed him. Moral: Not every story needs to make a fucking sense.

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Chuck Norris once went skydiving. his parachute did not deploy. where he landed is now known as the grand canyon

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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