A man walks into a bar. The ceiling was ringed with dozens of TV’s, much like your average sports bar. Unlike your average sports bar however, the TV’s were not featuring athletic competition. That is unless you consider vigorous and explicit gay sex between men hung like Tijuana mules to be a sport.

Yo momma is so fat, that she is not able to wear the clothes she wore the previous year.

Hi

what do you do when a dog bites your ear off? you see that you are bleeding then you scream.

What did the bi-polar girl do when she found our her ex-boyfriend was living with another woman? Nothing; she was happy for their new relationship and realized life moves on, in addition to taking the appropriate amount of medicine as directed by her doctor for her condition.

What's blue and fluffy? BLUE FLUFF What's white and fluffy? A BUNNY What's pink and fluffy? PINK FLUFF What's brown and fluffy? A PORCUPINE

Why did the asian man crash into the stop sign? Because there was a frog stapled to his face.

Why did the baby die? I killed it.

Whos the best Jewish Cook? Hitler.

Roses are red Violets are blue So is your face Cuz I just gagged you

Whats similar between a grape and a duck? They're both purple. except not the duck.

Why did Jimmy go to the doctor? He had just been hit by a semi truck and his legs were severed. He died later that night.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was taken to a factory where it was butchered, processed and eventually fed to America.

A penguin walks into a bakery. The baker asks the penguin: What kind of bread would you like, brown or white? Penguins answers: Well, it doesn't really matter since I drove here.

A man walks into the market. He asks a young attractive employee in a smooth voice, "Do you have any honey here, baby?" The employee responds, "No sir. I'm sorry."

Roses are red Violets are blue I have 5 fingers The middle one is for you

i jack off in the school bathroom #yolo -toby limbers

Why Did the one handed man cross the road? To get to the dying man on the other side

A black guy and a Mexican are in a car. who's driving? The black guy because he just turned 16. His school mate the Mexican child is still only 15 and he will have to wait a few more months before he can drive.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, Mitchell ate it before it could do so.

Roses are red Violets are fin I'll be the 6 You be the 9

What is worse than seeing your whole family die? Leaving your wallet on the bus.

A guy has cancer. He dies.

*you're

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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