Why did the plane crash? -Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

Who makes the sandwiches in a lesbian relationship?

What do you call a man with no arms or legs floating on the water? Dead.

What do you call a really small grape? A grape.

What do you get if you cross a Sheep with a Kangeroo. An abomination unto God.

If life throws you melons you might be dyslexic, but you also might not be.

What do you call an Arab flying a plane? A pilot.

What did Jim say to Bob? Hi Bob.

What is worse than a fly in your soup? Getting hit by a train.

Not an anti-joke, but an anti-pick-up-line: How much does a polar bear weight? Not as much as you!

what happened to the man with no arms or legs when he was pushed down a hill? nobody knows he is still going ........................................................................

I took your mother out to a fine seafood dinner. I never called her again.

Dylan Hodge likes to lick his mums penis to sleep every night.

OMG guess what she just told me!! idk......im deaf.

What did the dog say when the woman put a sweater on him? Nothing, dogs can't talk and he has no idea what is going on

why is Justin Berber gay? hes not thats rust a myth

How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? Well, if the socket were 20 feet in the air, it might take 4 blondes with really good balance. Then again, it might not matter how many blondes there are due to transportation issues. (What if there are no replacement light bulbs in the house, and the nearest store was 10 miles away? It would be ridiculous to expect someone to walk twenty miles to replace a light bulb) In conclusion, I would say that the number of blondes it takes to screw in a light bulb is dependent on the individual situation at hand.

what happens during a climax apples

Man who wrote "The Hokey Pokey" died. Hard part was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in and then the trouble started..

Why did the Mexican guy run to the hospital? Because it was faster than walking.

I hate it when sentences don't end the way you expect them potato.

bob saget

Woman's Rights

Knock knock Who's there A drummer A drummer who I'm not knocking on your door

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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