How to you kill two birds with one stone? You use a precision hunting rifle to mortally wound two flying birds, then put them on a platform and break their skulls with one rock. Separately.

You

what's the difference between fulham and sunderland ? hugh grant and lilly allen's dad

A blonde, a redhead and a brunette was stranded on a deserted island. A genie appeared and said nothing, because genies doesn't exist

How many dead babies can you fit in a drawer? 10 25* *if you use a blender

What do you call a dog eating a dead dog? A hungry dog

Reed is poopin

Someone asked me yesterday why my friend Portier is named after a sports car... I mean, fair enough, it is a common misconception but they live in the country and her Dad drives a tractor; think it through. [L]

Your mother is so stupid, she is unable to uphold a steady job and cannot support you financially.

What is scary? Obama might get reelected.

How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? Using teamwork and coordination, each can place one foot on the seat of the stool, and using each other for balance and support, they can all stand on the stool. The fact that they are gay is prevalent.

Why did sally fall of the swing? SHE HAD NO ARMS!

Why was the fat man removed from the restaurant? When his date didn't show up he started and crying and proceeded to stab himself with a fork

A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

Why did Billy drop his lunchbox? Because he was mauled by a Hippo.

Patients: Whats happening doctor Doctor: I am afraid you all have tested positive Patients: Oh No!!! Doctor: Positive for being great friends all these years! Patients: Oh Doctor you are so.... Doctor: ASWELL AS AIDS!!!

det va en tjej som va inne på ica och handlade, framme vid kassan la hon fram en banan, en billys pizza, ett litet paket bröd och en mjölk. -är du singel eller? frågar killen i kassan -ja hur visste du det, svarar hon -du e skitful ju

What happens when you drop the soap in Prison? You pick it back up and go about your business.

What lives in a pineapple under the sea? Japanese People

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, Ham and Cheese!

Why doe this filthy bitch take big dildos inside himself? Because he is gay.

Dani barton from bob chuckles

Why didn't peyton manning's grand mom call him after his game? She died of throat cancer 5 years ago

Mrs. Welsh

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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