Roses are red, violets are blue my name is clearance, and i have to poo

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John Katzenbach were drinking a soda... He is the author of The Psicoanalist

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monkey sponge

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To try and beat the oncoming car.

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Yo momma's so fat, her lifespan is probably going to be very short and you will have to bury her soon.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was a woman...

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Why do people like the number 69? Because some people have favorite numbers, and 69 is a number.

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Why did the gum cross the road? It was stuck to the chickens foot.

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What do you call a flying jew? Smoke.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why didnt she get back up? She had no friends.

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so there are 3 people who have heard of this magical cliff; theyre names are harry, dick, and joe. how the cliff works is that when you jump off you turn into whatever you say as you jump. first harry jumps off and yells plane, he turns into a plane and flys off. next dick jumps off and yells bird he turns into a bird and flys off. finally joe steps up to the cliff as he was walking he trips and falls as hes falling he yells HARRY DICK he than hits the ground and dies. everyone mourned for such a well respected individual.

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Q: What do you do if A bunch Of black Guys Are raping a white Girl A: Throw A Basketball at them.

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Im So Hood... That When I go Shopping, I Buy Sweatshirts with Hoods

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patty was in sunday school, the teacher asked her "patty who created the universe?" john sliped into the seat next to her and jabbed her with a pen "LORD ALMIGHTY" the teacher said' good patty now who gave himself for us? john again jabbed her with a pin "JESUS CHRIST" "that very good patty now what did mary say to joseph after they had their 23 child?" john jabbed her " IF YOU STICK THAT DAMN THING IN ME ONE MORE TIME ILL BREAK IT IN HALF!!!" the teacher fainted

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What's worse than doing the dishes with long sleeves? Finding out your girlfriend's been cheating on you.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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obama

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What's green and has wheels? PAIN!!! I lied about the green and the wheels.

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What's better than winning the special Olympics? Not being retarded.

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Q: What do you call a white guy cooking a dinner? A: A chef

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What lives in a pineapple under the sea? Japanese People

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What's worse than having AIDS. Being Black.

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Me and me!!!! LOL! i'm a comedian!

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What has two legs and is red all over? Half a cat

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops