A bear walks into a bar and says to the barman "I'll have a pint of................ beer please." The barman says "why the big pause?"

Why did people spend $100 on Kanye West's plain white T- shirt? Because it was a good looking T-shirt.

What does Helen Keller put at the end of every sentence? A period.

How do you starve a black man? You don't feed him.

The prefix "con" means bad. The prefix "pro" means good. So what is the opposite of progress? Regress.

what is it called when a woman is president. The Apacolypse.

Then help me understand Nero, people had the free and legal right to decide to be a part of our, or your society if you prefer, where has that option gone now? Where is the people that choose to believe in their own potential and in the one of their equals? Today we live in a society where its basically pop culture to dislike oneself, where it is considered narcissism to like oneself, and you know that we have both been affected, while those we considered allies before, have joined the same people that branded us evil.

A man walks into his local store, he gets a basket and get a tin of beans, an apple, some kitchen rolls a bag of potatoes and an 8 pack of sausages. He walks to the checkout and the lady working asks him ''Are you single?'' He replies ''Yes, i am actually, how did you know?'' The lady then says ''Because your Ugly as Sin''

knock knock! fu ck off i'm a shift worker trying to sleep

What's white on the top and black on the bottom? Society.

What did the black guy said when he ate a pie? Nothing, he learned not to speak with a full mouth.

What is a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick.

Why did Jim fall out of the tree? Because Jim is a leaf.

Yidi Huang lives here.

Q: Why was Tigger looking in the toilet? A: He was looking for pooh

Why did the black guy cross the road? i have no idea but i hope he got to the other side safely.

Backwards write to fun is it. As long as its forward. Emu

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. "Knock, Knock!" "Who's there?" "Not Sally"

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? IT WAS DEAD.

Q. Which is bigger, a dog or the Statue of Liberty? (Trick question! Think carefully before looking at the answer!) A. The Statue of Liberty.

Dear mom, I'm wearing skinny jeans. If I can't get them off, Neither can the rapist.

What's black and blue and red all over Sex

You can eat a pie. You can eat a chicken. But you cannot eat a human being because that would be called cannibalism and cannibalism is a felony that can give the government a right to hold you in an international detainment facility for up to 40 years.

How do you stop a rhino from charging? Try not to antagonise it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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