Why did the little girl cry when the x-ray showed her mom had a tumor? It was benign.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

How many aborigines does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They have no idea what electricity is.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

you ever put a vibrating phone on your b a l l s ???

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the red head never have a boyfriend? She was a lesbian and had always preferred women over men

thumb_up thumb_down +3

whats arrogant, has blonde hair and belongs in the kitchen? Gordon Ramsay

thumb_up thumb_down -43

Good for him. Thats wonderful!

thumb_up thumb_down -79

shall i compare thee to a summers day, no, because thee are ugly, yay

thumb_up thumb_down -111

What's black and blue and red all over Sex

thumb_up thumb_down +36

What do you call a man with multiple sexual partners? Well, first you strongly urge him to get tested for any contagious and potentially dangerous STD's that could have been transmitted from one partner's genitalia to another person's genitalia which could have very well been he himself. They could be life threatening. Oh, and call him by his first name.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

matt shut up

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Probably cheese, since there really isn't a possesive form of the noun.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

how do you double your cash? You rip it in half.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did Billy start crying? Becuase he's fat and stupid and noboy loves him

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the black man go to school? So he could graduate with a degree and persue his life in medicine. He later goes on to get his P.H.D. He now supports his healthy family of 5 and living in Idaho, the state of the potato. He has a job as a doctor and is making more than $2M a year. Ha, didn't expect that now did ya.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What's the difference between a Ferrari and a dumpster full of dead babies? There isn't a Ferrari in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

what do you call a black man on the moon? Kid Cudi

thumb_up thumb_down -22

If I said "This AntiJoke will get thumbs up" It will get thumbs up

thumb_up thumb_down -60

Why did the Blonde say something stupid? Because she is stupid

thumb_up thumb_down +161

A bear walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender knows that bears can't talk and realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and rolls over to tell his wife about the dream. She hears the joke, but turns away from him and pretends to be asleep. Then the bartender begins to cry. His marriage is in shambles.

thumb_up thumb_down +113

What is the priest favorite book? The Bible

thumb_up thumb_down +63

what does an Ethiopian man say to greet a Chinese man well, first they must locate a translator fluent in both said languages, but they would most likely say hello

thumb_up thumb_down +59

who is still together after all the crap they have been through? your butt cheeks

thumb_up thumb_down +29

what is worse then breaking on arm breaking two arms what is worse then breaking two arms the holocaust what is then the holocaust Obama care.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

"Behold, the greatest invention Man has ever seen!" exclaimed the inventor of eyes.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops