A horse walks into a bar and then out of the bar

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? The pigmentation of their hair follicles.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Question: What is black and white and read all over? Guess: A newspaper? Answer: No. A zebra that was shot by a poacher. Poaching is a serious problem all over the world and should be looked down upon by all. It is not something to joke about.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Republicans

thumb_up thumb_down +12

I had my period 3 days ago.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Billy comes home from playing with his friend as he walks to his front yard he comes across his mother...she is dead on the floor his friend then says "im SO sorry your mom is dead but at least you still have your dad" Billy than replies "my mom is my dad" billy then is put into a foster home and spends years trying to recover from the fact that he is the freak offspring of a hermaphrodite

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A king's son's birthday came one day and the king asked what he wanted. "You can have anything in the world son." He would say. The prince answered,"Oh i'll have some purple ping pong balls." So for his birthday he got a rollar costar, a new car, a water park, a castle, and of corse some purple ping pong balls. The same answer went out of his mouth for three years. One day the prince was driving in his car, and he got into a terrible car accadent. And while he was in the ER and saying his last words, his father asked,"Son, before you die, i must know, why did you want purple ping pong balls for your all of those birthdays?" And the prince said,"Well I wanted them because-" and then he died.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

whats the same about a spider and a grape? they both have eight legs, except for the grape.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A proton and a neutron talk to each other. Two atoms are walking down the street one day, and one of them says to the other: "Hey, wait up a second. I think I lost an electron" The first atom replied, "Are you sure?" The second atom said, "Oh, wait. Never mind. I found it."

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What happened after Peter broke his toe? He went into cardiac arrest and died.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What do you call a black man on a bicycle? A cyclist.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What time is it? Ask chuck Norris! Gosh!!

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Knock knock Who's there? Sergeant Sergeant who? Sergeant John Clancy. I regret to inform you that Billy your son has just unfortunately been killed in the electronic fan factory in which he works.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

women's rights

thumb_up thumb_down +12

"Knock Knock!" "Who's Their?" "Mew" "Mew Who?" "Mew Two Stupid! Get yo Pokemon FACTS Right!" "Mew Two Proceeds to walk away in distress"

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Where did the little girl go when the bomb went off? Everywhere

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Q: Why did the singer stop singing? A: Someone threw a car at her face.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Blonde walks into a bar. Man walks up to blonde and says a pick-up line. Blonde says "Crap, this is a gay bar?"

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Yo daddy!

thumb_up thumb_down +10

motley crew

thumb_up thumb_down +10

what's worse than finding a fat couple in a buffet?

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Roses are red, Violets are blue. My mom went to the doctor and found out she has cancer, so when she told me, I was eccentric. That tree is green.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops