One morning a man was frustrated at the dining table. His wife ask "What's wrong?". He says "I can't fit this stupid puzzle pieces together." His wife asks "What's it a picture of?" The man says "A rooster" The wife says "Honey, put the cornflakes back in the cereal box." The man says "no".

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what has four legs but cant walk? a dog after A-N-A-L

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Wow, that was a long opinion for someone that does supposedly not watch Hentai, hey, if you like hentai thats cool, I was about your age when I got really tired of watching sex drawn or not and just you know, went for it real life as they say nowadays. I just happen to like your eyes, I mean you do not like them, but avoid mirrors and I will be the one looking at them. Chobits, yeah, I watched that a looong time ago, then deathnote, and then nothing because I got too old for that stuff, Oh wait, gungrave, that I also watched.

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While walking along the beach, a man stubs his toe on a half buried lamp. He picks it up, dusts it off, and a enormous Genie appears in front of him. "You have released me from my 10,000 year imprisonment. I will grant you 3 wishes to repay you." says the Genie. The man quickly uses his 1st wish for wealth and the 2nd for the love of a beautiful woman. Unable to think of a 3rd wish and seeing the sunken look on the Genie's face, he wished for the Genie's freedom. The Genie uses his unrestrained powers to kill the man, resurrect Hitler and enslave the human race.

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What did the man say when he found out he had cancer? Nothing. He was so in shock, that he later died from another type of cancer.

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Why didn't the girl put on her mascara? Because she was too poor to buy any.

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What did the dog say to the mailman? nothing, dogs lack the mental capacity for human speech therefore he was unable to communicate his message verbally

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how do you make a baby cry kick it off a cliff

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7am, waking up in the morning Gotta be fresh, gotta go downstairs Gotta have my bowl, gotta have cereal Seein’ everything, the time is goin’ Tickin’ on and on, everybody’s rushin’ Gotta get down to the bus stop Gotta catch my bus, I see my friends (My friends) Kickin’ in the front seat Sittin’ in the back seat Gotta make my mind up Which seat can I take? It’s Friday, Friday Gotta get down on Friday REBECCA BLACK FTW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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Colby is gay.... thats it

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Your mama's so poor, that it's hard for her to pay her bills.

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rose are red violets should be purple

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What do you call a black man at harvard? Probably a criminal who is in harvard law trying to find a good lawyer.

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What did the deaf man say to the blind man? Look out there's a bus in front of you

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What do you call a dog with no arms or legs? Doormat.

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Why did the Hispanic man have no job? Because we are in a recession, and work is hard to come by in this tough economy.

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So what do you guys wanna do?? Anything, I still have cancer..

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Hey, you pee here? Yes, it's called a urinal

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yo mama's so fat!!!

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There were 4 black people in a Cadillac driving off a cliff. The sad thing was it was a nice car.

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Your Mom's sooo fat that when she jumps into a pool her splash attack does damage :P

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Q: Why did the rich Wallstreet business man move into Harlem? A: Because sex offenders weren't welcome anywhere else.

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Why did the house get trashed? Cause the babysitter was a rooster

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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