Win and Beau have no friends

There once was a man from Nantucket who had an affinity for wicker furniture.

Why did the blonde become a cannibal? Because she got hungry.

Why did the bus crash? The driver was a tomato.

i like tits

you thought i was going to write a joke.. bitch

if life gives you lemons you probably have problems

What's the difference between a whale and an elephant

The Sarah Palin bus tour to teach children about history.

Never-mind that, you've got AIDS.

"Doctor! Doctor! It hurts when I urinate!" "you may have a kidney stone"

What is the difference between a car and dead babies? The car is legally obtainable by law and can run on gasoline, when dead babies are nonliving humans, and the owner of which would most likely be sent to jail.

Why did the man rob a bank? Because he was poor.

A man walks into a bar and orders a water. He then drinks his water and leaves. The following day he returns to the bar and again orders a water. He repeats this for many days until finally one day the bartender asks him why he comes every day to just drink water. The man replies, "Water is free. I got laid off from my job last week. Rough economy, you know." The bartender starts charging him for water, and the man becomes homeless.

How can you tell that your friend just had sex with a blonde? The girl he just had sex with has blonde hair.

If a tree falls in the forest does a woman hear it? Probably, but the real question is why is there a tree in the kitchen?

What is worse than something terrible happening to you? That same thing happening to me of course... Duh...

Your mom.

What did the Scientist say to the bookstore owner he met? "Hi."

two parrots are seated on a perch. One turns to the other and says, "Do you smell fish?"

Why do flamingos hold up one leg?f If they held up two they'd fall down.

what did the crippled boy say to the truck driver? "i like cats."

why was little bobby sad? he accidentally super-glued Jupiter to his forehead.

The man who invented the teleprompter has died at the age of 91. When President Obama heard the news, he was speechless.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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