What's the difference between me and convicted pedophile? -The pedophile's been caught ;)

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Why did LeBron James up and bail on Cleveland? He thought there was a greater opportunity for postseason success by playing in Miami.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it got out of it coop and there was something shinny on the other side of the street.

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I like hats XD!

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Why was Soren gay? Because he likes to eat men's Penises!

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Knock knock, Who's there? To get to the other side

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Men, get on the boat.

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whats the difference between jimmy saville and a horse? jimmy has a bigger cock

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Your maternal figure contains so many Triglycerides, her belt size is greater than or equal to the circumference of the Earth.

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Christopher Reeve walks into a room.

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What's the best thing about 27 year old's? There are 20 of them.

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so there are 3 people who have heard of this magical cliff; theyre names are harry, dick, and joe. how the cliff works is that when you jump off you turn into whatever you say as you jump. first harry jumps off and yells plane, he turns into a plane and flys off. next dick jumps off and yells bird he turns into a bird and flys off. finally joe steps up to the cliff as he was walking he trips and falls as hes falling he yells HARRY DICK he than hits the ground and dies. everyone mourned for such a well respected individual.

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How do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at its face.

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3 penguins meet each other in penguin #1's backyard for a pool party. The first penguin climbs up the steps of the water slide gets to the top, looks around and then slides down the slide *SPLASH* The second penguin climbs up the steps, looks around then slides down the slide *SPLASH* The third penguin hastily climbs the steps and slides down the slide radio -Soulbroker

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A man walks into a bar with a sad-looking face. He orders a strong drink. The bartender asks him "What's wrong? You seem down." The man answers "Well, tough week. My wife was raped and murdered and my son was hit by a bus."

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What's green and has wheels? PAIN!!! I lied about the green and the wheels.

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Did you hear about the guy who came home one night and found his wife in bed with his best friend? He had just returned from a trip to the grocery store, where he'd purchased bread, milk, eggs, broccoli, yams, tea, and brownie mix.

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What's worse than dropping your ice cream? Being Killed

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Why don't they sell pharmaceuticals in the rain forest? Because it is to sparsely populated and not economically viable.

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How many watermelons did the black man have? Too many to count, he was a farmer and his primary crop was watermelons.

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Why do people like the number 69? Because some people have favorite numbers, and 69 is a number.

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bum sex lol

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Cancer.

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Q: Wanna hear a dirty joke? A: Your mother sucks.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops