Why did the dog cross the road? He didn't, he got run over

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Why didn't Billy have legs? Because he's a fish.

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A black guy and a Mexican are in a car. who's driving? The black guy because he just turned 16. His school mate the Mexican child is still only 15 and he will have to wait a few more months before he can drive.

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Why did the baby cry? Because his parents dropped him on his head.

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What is worse than seeing your whole family die? Leaving your wallet on the bus.

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What did the bungee jumper say to his wife? Honey, I'm going bungee jumping today.

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People could crack eggs but Chuck Norris could crack chickens.

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Two Jews walk into a bank. They make a deposit and leave.

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What's small, cold, and lifeless? A dead baby.

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How do you get a baby in a blender? Feet first so you can see the expression on it's face. How do you get it out ? Nacho chips!

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A christian, a Jew, and a muslim walk into a bar. They order their drinks and have a good night because no one knows they are all of different religions.

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why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the retard's house *knock knock* who's there? the chicken

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what is sad about gingers ? they are an unrecognised visible minority.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? neither has he

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Why did Silly Billy throw a clock out the window? Because he was stupid.

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A black man and a white woman walk out of a mall restroom holding hands and sweating. The white woman is arrested on the spot for statutory rape and sent to prison for 10 years. The black man was barely 16 years old.

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Haikus are easy, But sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

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What has one eye but cannot see? A brick with an eye drawn on it

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I just flew in from Chicago and boy are my legs cramped

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Why did the penguin die? due to an increase in the quantity of greenhouse gases that are being released into the atmosphere, global warming is on the rise. So the penguin died because his home melted.

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A man walks by with a bat. A little girl crosses the street. He hits her with it because she is a little shit. A homeless atheist sees and reports it immeaditately to the authorities because it was child abuse.

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Q: What's the deal with air line food? A: An airline meal or in-flight meal is a meal served to passengers on board a commercial airliner. These meals are prepared by airline catering services. The first kitchens preparing meals in-flight were established by United Airlines in 1936. These meals vary widely in quality and quantity across different airline companies and classes of travel. They range from a simple beverage in short-haul economy class to a seven-course gourmet meal in long-haul first class.

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Every time a bell rings, a noise is made.

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Hey i just met you and this is crazy i suck at rhyming door knob

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops