What would you call the fatty cranial mass surrounding a malignant tumor? Ted Kennedy's Head.

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What's heavy, black, and when hanging by a rope from a tree, makes white people happy? A tire, in any white football player's backyard.

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Q. what did the gay man say about the smoothie? A. he said "that is soooo good"

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milk,eggs,butter,deodorant,chocolate syrup,chile powder,dildo,bacon

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Whats the worst part of having a Birthday on Feb. 29th? You only get facebook birthday wishes every 4 years.

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How do you have sex with hellen keller? Very sweetly

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what's worse than finding out god isn't real? finding out he is

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When does George Harrison take a shit? In the morning

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A-B-C-D-E-F-G-R-U-D-T-F With me

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raping black women

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What's red and has a mask ? Blood, I lied about the mask.

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What's the difference between Mike Tyson and Anna Nicole Smith? Mike Tyson's not dead.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have 5 fingers The middle one is for you

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DAMMIT MY IPHONE IS IN REPAIR AND I CANT GET THE APP!!!!!!!

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What's funny about 4 black people going off a cliff in a Cadillac? Nothing. You're adopted

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Why don't women need watches? Because most people carry cell phones that tells them the time making watches redundant and obsolete.

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Q: What do you get when you cross Marvel and Capcom? A: Marvel vs. Capcom.

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What's worse than being held hostage? Waking up and finding dick your mouth

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DONT READ THIS. YOU WILL BE KISSED ON THE NEAREST POSSIBLE FRIDAY BYrnTHE LOVE OF YOUR LIFE.TOMMOROW WILL BE THE BEST DAY OF YOUR LIFE. NOWrnYOU'VE STARTED READING THIS. DON'T STOP. THIS IS SO FREAKY.rn1. say your name ten times.rn2.say your mom's name five times.rn3. say your crushes three timesrn4. paste this to four other groups.rnIf you do this, your crush will kiss you on the nearest Friday.rnBut if you read this and do not paste this, then yournwill have very bad luck.rnSEND THIS TO 5 GROUPS IN 143 MINUTES. WHENrnYOU'RE DONE PRESS F6 AND YOUR CRUSH'S NAME WILL APPEAR IN BIG LETTERSrnON THE SCREEN. THIS IS SO FREAKY BECAUSE IT ACTUALLY WORKSrnrnrn

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How do you make a Jew cry? You kill all of their friends and family members.

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How does a gay take his pants off? Just like everybody else

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs, flotaing in the sea? Someone who will drown very soon.

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THEY SAY SEEING IS BELIEVING. I NEVER SAW 9/11! 9/11? NEVER HAPPENED -Jonathan

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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