Roses are red, violets are blue. I have a gun, get in the van

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Why Are Parking Lines White? - So You Can See Them..

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What did the Muslim say to the Sikh? "Hello. Lovely weather today."

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Q.) How do you fit a baby into a bowl? A.) With a blender! Q.) How do you get it out? A.) With Tostitos! -Sebastian and Chris (aka 100 and Zelot) (we did not make this joke, we just had to share it)

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What did the baby with Downs syndrome say to the baby with cancer? Nothing, baby's can't talk

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A woman leaves the kitchen.

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Why did the boys uncle stop calling him? His uncle died of cancer 3 months ago.

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Whats worse than biting into your apple and finding a worm? Biting into your dog and finding a worm.

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Why can't Hank drive? Hank is a stone.

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How do you starve a celebrity? Tell them they're fat.

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what's better to a kid than ice cream from an ice cream truck? when you realize the driver was at your house 3 days ago notifying you that he is a convicted pedophile.

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Where do you find a one-legged cat? Right where you left it.

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What's worse than sibling rivalry? having no bones

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Yo mama so stupid She took in part of an experiment and was indeed proclaimed stupid.

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Ay Bee Cee Dee Ey Ef Gee Haych Eye Jay Kay El Em En Ow Pee Queue Our Es Tee You Vee Doubleyou Ex Why Zed Now you know your ABC, come along and sing with me!

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what did Santa Claus say to Nikki Minaj? I really admire your musical talents

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knock knock who's there police

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What is Beethoven's favorite fruit? While Beethoven enjoyed many different varieties of fruit, he found strawberries the most appealing.

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A black guy, a white guy and a Pakistani are walking together when they see a lamp, They rub the lamp and out pops a Genie who, with only three wishes to grant, lets them have one wish each. The Pakistani wishes that all people of Pakistani origin are returned to their country with health and wealth. The black guy thinks this is a good idea and asks for the same for all Africans and Caribbean's. The white guy says "are there really no more Pakistani's or blacks in the country?" The Genie confirms this is accurate. The white guy is devastated, who will drive the buses, operate the power stations, produce the medicines and work in the hospitals that these people did? I wish for them to be returned.

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A man is writing with a #2 pencil. He looks down and sees that it says "Made in China." He shrugs and continues writing

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Why did the penguin die? due to an increase in the quantity of greenhouse gases that are being released into the atmosphere, global warming is on the rise. So the penguin died because his home melted.

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Question: What is black and white and read all over? Guess: A newspaper? Answer: No. A zebra that was shot by a poacher. Poaching is a serious problem all over the world and should be looked down upon by all. It is not something to joke about.

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Do you know your videogames? Test your might!: Getal Sear Molid = Metal Gear Solid. Do you get these though? Combatfrogs. Mechapoliceofficer vs The Enders. Outdoor battlers: Second encounter, speedy version. Above Average Luciano Siblings. Area of the Beginners (if you get this one u are epik!) Monkey D0ng (not so epik :P) G-one (pretty good if you get this one too) Lethal Fighting. (LETHAL FIGHTING!!!) Exploder Guy (kudos if you get it) Requirement for velocity (lol) Weeds vs the Frankensteins (decent) So how many did you get? Check the comment section for the answers.

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Hope you all drop the soap in prison

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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