I scream. You scream. We all scream and huddle in a corner of our first grade classroom because of a masked gunman.

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If a tree falls, and nobody is around to hear it, does it still make a sound? No. While the falling tree surely creates mechanical oscillations in the air, sound is defined as the mechanical oscillations in the air perceived by humans. Therefore, since no humans were around to hear the tree fall, it did not create a sound.

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how do you kill a blonde? shoot her in the face with a pistol

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What's worse then 10 babies nailed to one tree? Nailed to 10 trees

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how can you tell if your moms fat? if Dora can't explore her (mx)

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Yo mama is so ugly, she entered an ugly contest and placed well in her division.

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why couldn't the boy eat his oreo's? His sister ate it.

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Student; Miss, please may I go toilet? Teacher; Yes, but say your alphabet first. Student; Ok

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What happened when the white man saw a black man running with a purse? He called the police. The police proceeded to chase the black man down tackling him into a dumpster, causing permanent spinal damage. Upon investigation into the situation, the black man was deaf and he was bringing the purse, which contained an epi-pen, to his dying wife a block away. The white man who called the police and the police officers involved were sued by the family for a large sum of money.

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Why did the chicken cross the road. Because, It can't fly

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A black guy walks into a shoe store and buys a pair of size 14 shoes. The cashier smiles and says: so is it true what they say about big feet? The black guy laughs for a moment and responds: yeah it's really hard to find socks that fit.

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What doesnt have arms and legs? A brick.

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If we all evolved from apes. Abbie didnt go that far

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A dog and a bird are sitting in the front yard of a small suburban community. The bird turns to the dog and says nothing, because birds lack the ability to speak. The dog then reaches down and slowly consumes the bird before returning to his house.

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What is black but also yellow? A song.

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a man walks into a bar it hurt

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im a straight dude and all the gay dudes at school make fun of me oh wait i wrote that backwards

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Whats worse than a Worm in Your Apple? Being raped

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What would you do for a Klondike bar? I'd probably pay in cash.

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What starts with a P and ends with a O-R-N? Popcorn

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Dani barton= lovely

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Why did the rabbit fall out of the tree? because it was dead Why did the bird fall out of the tree? because it was stapled to the rabbit

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Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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I'm gay. No homo.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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