A man walks into a school, he then proceeds to gun down the majority of the students before taking his own life. What a sad, sad day.

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What is it called when your friend tells you that Justin Beiber was laid? Lying.

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British Dentistry

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Why was the Blonde Crying? -because she had just witnessed her infant get sucked through a jet engine and was very sad.

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What was the dying boy's last wish? Not to die.

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Q. Why did the boy drop his ice cream? A. Because he slipped on his moms three day old tampon.

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What did the white guy say to the Mexican when he entered the US? How was your flight?

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Dear mom, I'm wearing skinny jeans. If I can't get them off, Neither can the rapist.

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Did you hear about the blond who went to college? She got her masters. became and environmental scientist, married a nice man, and had two wonderful children. After retiring at age 65, she spent the rest of her days living in a cozy beachside house.

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Yidi Huang lives here.

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What stinks and comes out of someones mouth. Bad Breath

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What did the rap singer say to the other rap singer? "You just got served. Here, read this subpoena and sign it, verifying your understanding of the document."

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Flop dog

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Q: a blonde, a brunette, and redhead jump off a cliff, which one hits the ground first? A: Most likely the one that weighs more

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What is sad about four lawyers in a car driving of a cliff? The car fit six people.

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If you are riding a horse, how many watermelons does it take to kill a giraffe? Platypus.

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Your mom walks into a bar.

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how do you warm someone up? you set their house on fire.

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What did little Jimmy say when he met God ? Nothing, God doesn't exist.

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Then lets give this another shot, this time we stop questioning how to make others happy, and if that is what makes us happy, then we ask: What else.

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A bear walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender knows that bears can't talk and realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and rolls over to tell his wife about the dream. She hears the joke, but turns away from him and pretends to be asleep. Then the bartender begins to cry. His marriage is in shambles.

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How many Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb? Watermelons don't have feet.

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What did the the policeman say to the band member who trashed a hotel room? "You're under arrest" The band member replied "Well, you're under a vest" The policeman reiterates that this isn't the time to be making any jokes and that vandalism is a very serious offence

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what is it called when a woman is president. The Apacolypse.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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