Why was the fish disappointed with his grades? They were all below C-level!

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What was the worst part about the Holocaust? -When it ended

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What is Michael Bay's favorite fruit? Melon

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If I said "This AntiJoke will get thumbs up" It will get thumbs up

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Why did the man shut up? because he was told to

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Yo mama so fat, she was accepted to a clinical trial for treatment of morbid obesity in middle-aged women.

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knock knock! fu ck off i'm a shift worker trying to sleep

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What's the square root of 69? 8.306623862918075

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The prefix "con" means bad. The prefix "pro" means good. So what is the opposite of progress? Regress.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead

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Mitch

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how do you double your cash? You rip it in half.

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Why couldn't Michael ask out Mary? Because Mary had been dead for dead for 10 years.

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what does an Ethiopian man say to greet a Chinese man well, first they must locate a translator fluent in both said languages, but they would most likely say hello

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How many aborigines does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They have no idea what electricity is.

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What do you call a man with multiple sexual partners? Well, first you strongly urge him to get tested for any contagious and potentially dangerous STD's that could have been transmitted from one partner's genitalia to another person's genitalia which could have very well been he himself. They could be life threatening. Oh, and call him by his first name.

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What is a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick.

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What's black and buried in my backyard? An African American, I'm a member of the Ku Klux Klan

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What's worse than finding a hair in your sandwitch? Finding a dead baby in your salad!

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What came first: the chicken or the egg? God.

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What did the girl say to her tits? I wanna suck u.

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Phillip has 200 pieces of candy, Phillip eats 185 pieces of that candy, what does Phillip have left? Diabetes, Phillip has diabetes.

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Q. Which is bigger, a dog or the Statue of Liberty? (Trick question! Think carefully before looking at the answer!) A. The Statue of Liberty.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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