You smell like shit

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A black man found chicken on the floor. He ate it.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

People could crack eggs but Chuck Norris could crack chickens.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Two Jews walk into a bank. They make a deposit and leave.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

There once was a man in Peru Who dreamed he was eating his shoe He awoke with a fright In the middle of the night To find that someone was breaking into his house

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's red and u drink it Koolaid

thumb_up thumb_down +13

a priest and a rabbi walk into a bar... they sit down, have a deep and meaningful conversation about theism, and don't really drink anything.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Nate has 32 candy bars. he eats 28 of them. What is he left with? 4 candy bars

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the penguin die? due to an increase in the quantity of greenhouse gases that are being released into the atmosphere, global warming is on the rise. So the penguin died because his home melted.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How do you make a black man sad? You kill and mutilate his family maliciously

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Billy comes home from playing with his friend as he walks to his front yard he comes across his mother...she is dead on the floor his friend then says "im SO sorry your mom is dead but at least you still have your dad" Billy than replies "my mom is my dad" billy then is put into a foster home and spends years trying to recover from the fact that he is the freak offspring of a hermaphrodite

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What is better than winning the gold medal at the Special Olympics? Not being retarded

thumb_up thumb_down +13

An astronaut and a cosmonaut are sitting in a bar, discussing who was better. The cosmonaut says, "We Russians were the first people in space!" The astronaut says, "That may be true, but we were the first to land on the moon my friend." The cosmonaut turns back to the astronaut and says, "Yes, but we shall be then first to ever land on the Sun!" So, the astronaut skeptically asks, "And how do you intend to do that?" The cosmonaut replies, "Simple.......we will go at night." Thank you to David Cross

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A man walks by with a bat. A little girl crosses the street. He hits her with it because she is a little shit. A homeless atheist sees and reports it immeaditately to the authorities because it was child abuse.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A gorilla walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender stands speechless due to the ridiculousness of the situation -Tag

thumb_up thumb_down +13

what do you get when you combine a cat and a dog? nothing since it is impossible to combine a cat and a dog

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did the Lumberjack say before cutting down the tree? Nothing, it's his job.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why Did the one handed man cross the road? To get to the dying man on the other side

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why? Because!

thumb_up thumb_down +11

who do hannah morgan and bonnie do in their free time? ANTI JOKEZ

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why do guys love to wrestle? They like to have physical contact with other men.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Simple poke her face.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the retard's house *knock knock* who's there? the chicken

thumb_up thumb_down +11

what is sad about gingers ? they are an unrecognised visible minority.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops