Q:What did the furry say to the other? A: Probably nothing, cant be easy speaking with a dick in your mouth...

thumb_up thumb_down +18

THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE!

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Q:Ask me if I'm a tree Are you a tree A: No

thumb_up thumb_down +16

A gay kid and a group of his friends are at the park. Gay: hey can you do a cartwheel? Girl: helllll no! Gay: Are you straight? Girl: Yah? Gay: Im gay and i can do one.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

This is a little story about four people named Everybody, Somebody, Anybody, and Nobody. There was an important job to be done and Everybody was sure that Somebody would do it. Anybody could have done it, but Nobody did it. Somebody got angry about that because it was Everybody's job. Everybody thought that Anybody could do it, but Nobody realized that Everybody wouldn't do it. It ended up that Everybody blamed Somebody when Nobody did what Anybody could have done

thumb_up thumb_down +16

water, hydrated silica, glycerin, sorbitol, PVM/MA copolymer, sodium lauryl sulfate, flavor, cellulose gum, sodium hydroxide, propylene glycol, carrageenan, sodium saccharin, titanium dioxide all adds up to colgate. SO AS A MATTER OF FACT, CHEESE PLUS PIE IS CHICKEN. CONSIDERING THE FACT THAT I LIKE SAYING CHEESE, JACK AND JILL WENT UP THE HILL BECAUSE THEY WERE BAGELS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What is striped black and white? A prisoner in jail arrested for the murder of a 7 year old child.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Jack and Jill climbed up the hill .... and fetched a pail of water.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What's gay, has ten eyes and is gay. One D. Kelvin Yang.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What is the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

A man walks in to a bar and says "ouch."

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What's the difference between Hitler and shit? Shit has a shower in the morning.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

what the difference between matthew and a retard? The retard can do math

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did Silly Billy throw a clock out the window? Because he was stupid.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Roses are red, Violets aren't blue, They're fucking violet, And I hate you.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

maths is annoying!!! LIKE if you agree!!!!! :D

thumb_up thumb_down +16

liam buchan is gay !

thumb_up thumb_down +14

why did the baby cross the road? because it was stapled to the chicken -written by sion dafydd jones, uk

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did Jimmy go to the doctor? He had just been hit by a semi truck and his legs were severed. He died later that night.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, Mitchell ate it before it could do so.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Win and Beau have no friends

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Q - What do you call a hamburger without pickles? A - You call it a hamburger just without the pickles.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the baby cry? Because his parents dropped him on his head.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why couldn't the unicorn fly? It was a horse.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops