Q: Why didnt the irishman walk out of the bar? A: He died of severe alchoholism and had a heart attack and died istantly

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Why didn't the family go through the door? Because it was a window.

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Why do white people despise black people? Because they are good at everything we suck at.

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bob saget

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Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything's black, I'm Blind.

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Why didn't the man cross the road? He was paralyzed.

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TEAM Together Everyone Argues More

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How long did it take for Michael to screw in the lightbulb? 37 minutes. Michael has cerebral palsy.

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What is brown and sticky? A stick

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What do you call a black man who is poor, homeless, and HIV positive? Unlucky.

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Why couldn't the pirate boy see the movie? He was blind.

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How did the blonde girl get pregnant? Her boyfriend used a condom left in his pants and then was washed. Making it defective and causing her her to become pregnant.

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Why did the boy not wake up on time for school? He was fuck in dead.

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Why did the black man order a bucket of Kentucky Fried Chicken? His wife just died in a tragic car accident and he is a horrible cook.

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What's red and hurts you? A brick.

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Why did the mass murderer abandon his killing spree? He found out it was illegal.

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Why did the monkey fall from the tree? It was dead.

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Yo mamma is so fat she needs a highly dangerous gastrointestinal bypass and if she dies you will wish she had made more of an effort to diet.

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Q: how many oxen does it take to row up the empire state building in half of a green canoe under the purple sun while eating a dead moose with no arms? A: Purple, because snakes have no elbows.

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How many WOMEN does it take to change a light bulb? YOU ALREADY KNOW ITS GONNA BE MORE THAN ONE!

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A little boy started choking on a condom. His father came and was in a great panic. "Please don't leave me. I don't want to lose you!" he cried over and over again. Then his wife came in and said "it's alright darling, there's plenty more in the drawer". "Oh, thank God for that, I thought I lost it there!" dad replied.

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what do you call a animal with 3 horns. a triceratops

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The internet is the most terrible fucking place in existence.

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What's another word for a priest? Rapist

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops