Q

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there's 4 men, a rabbi, a priest, a monk, and a captain. they all go on the captain's ship for a cruise with a couple hundred people. this was during the cold war, and the ship was mistaken for a war ship, and the russians missled it. the monk says: "we have to get everyone off the ship!" the rabbit say: "NO! the women and children need to get off first! And we should also hail to Satan!" the Captain says: "OMG! It's a talking Rabbit!" the priest then stops the rabbit to death!" the rabbi says: "The rabbit is right! But just the children!" The Captain says: "Screw the children! this ship is going to Hell, we have talking animals saying we should worship the devil!" the priest says: "Do you think we have time" the monk, the rabbi, and the captain stare and beat him to death.... "Well, he was already going to Hell" the Monk says. But during this entire time the ship has been sinking and another missle blows up the ship. Everyone dies, except for Sean Conery...and Chuck Norris.

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A grandmother in her late seventies is walking to the grocery store. Then out of nowhere,she stats getting pelted by bananas. One hits her hard on the head,and she dies.

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Penis

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Where did the moon get its degree? Unfortunately, they haven't installed any colleges for planetary satellites yet.

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why did the lesbians shop at modell's? because they thought the store had reasonable prices and considerable discounts

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Roses are red Violets are blue Your mom is dead And your dad is too

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An airplane crashes into a state park. There are no survivors. Susan continues her stroll in the park, considering she is blind, deaf and in a wheelchair, she isn't aware of the nearby disturbance

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i was going to say a gay joke butt f*** it.

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if life gives you lemons...chuck them back and say i wanted muffins instead!!!!

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Why did the man climb the mountain? Because he lacked excitement in his life.

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Wanna hear a joke? Women's rights

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Why Are Parking Lines White? - So You Can See Them..

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Two rocks are in the playground. Nothing happens, because rocks are not sentient beings and are thus incapable of producing any sort of activity on their own.

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Knock Knock And then I looked through the peephole and I saw it was the handyman that was going to fix my leaky sink so I opened the door

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Q.why was ireland takin over by the brits A.they wanted it

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What's black and white and eats like a horse? A zebra.

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Al Kida and Terry Wrist walk out of jail.

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Your time.

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Whats worst than a worm in you apple? 2 worms in your apple. Whats worst than two worms in your apple? An apple in your Worm. Whats worst than that? I don't know plenty of international tragedies such as plane crashes, and please don't say the holocaust. I was going to say 2 apples in your worm.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, This poem's cool. I ran over your dog.

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A Priest, a Rabbi, and an Orca Whale walk into a local eatery to discuss what is on their mind. The Priest says he is proud that even though their community is comprised of people residing in many different religions, they still work together to strive for a better tomorrow. The Rabbi nods his head in agreement,he states that he is proud of all the hard working men in their community that are willing to make sacrifices for the needy. The Orca Whale also nods in agreement and pauses for a moment to think while he insight-fully gleams at his two other friends. The Mighty Orca Whale then contributes to the conversation by saying eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurrrr!

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One muffin turns to the other and says "Is it hot in here?" The other muffin says "Yes. It feels like 425 degrees."

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Why was the white man rich and the black man poor? Because when the white man was 11 and he didn't have a job because 11 year olds don't get hired, because its not legal, he use to pick up pennies. And when the black man was 11 he got a job mowing lawns and ended up being a lawyer graduate and spent the rest of his life paying off his school loan. The white man lived in the 70's and the black man lived in he twentieth century.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


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