Knock, Knock Who's there? The interrupting doctor The inter- You have cancer

Parents: What do you want for your birthday? Boy: A yellow ping pong ball. 7th birthday P: What would you like for your birthday son? B: A yellow ping pong ball 13th birthday P: What would you like for you birthday son? B:A yellow ping pong ball. P:Hmm, fine. 17th birthday P: What would you like for your birthday son? B: A yellow ping pong ball. P: That's is I'm getting you a car! Day before 18th the boy drives into a bridge. He lies in his hospital bed and his parents are there. P: What would you like for you birthday tomorrow? B: A yellow ping pong ball. P: Fine. Why do you want these ping pong balls anyway? B: Because. And then he died.

Q: Who are the fastest readers? A: 9/11 jumpers 200 stories in 5 seconds

What happened when the lawyer pissed all over the judge? He was thrown off the case, causing him to go home, rape his wife, and put a bullet into his child's head.

Chuck Norris once went skydiving. his parachute did not deploy. where he landed is now known as the grand canyon

What do you call a gay woman who likes to smoke cigarettes? A lesbian with a possible nicotine addiction.

Type 2 diabetics

what happens when a jew meets a black person answer: they greet one another

Why is a blonde a door knob... Because everybody gets a turn

What did Helen Keller name her dog? Well i would imagine one of various names for a domesticated animal and she would choose the name based on her likes towards nature or an element of nature, being the educated individual she i would think she may name it base on a person of importance, such as an author or maybe a writer that inspires her.

The graduate with a Science degree asks, "Why does it work?" The graduate with an Engineering degree asks, "How does it work?" The graduate with an Accounting degree asks, "How much will it cost?" The graduate with a Liberal Arts degree asks, "Do you want fries with that?"

twilight

What did the fish say when he ran into a wall?

What do you call a black man who is poor, homeless, and HIV positive? Unlucky.

What's the square root of 69? 8.3

How do you survive the plague? you dont.

Knock Knock Who's there? A mormon *slam*

your mom is so old. she can legally get a senior discount

How do you make a clown sad? You hit him in the face with axe

Why are pirates called pirates? Because it derives from the Latin word, pirata.

I like my women like I like my coffee. Without a penis

Why did the baby die? Abortion

So a black man hails a taxi...

If John has 50 candy bars and eats 45, how many does he have? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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