Yo momma is so fat that we are incredibly concerned for her health.

what did the deaf man say to his long-lost paraplegic brother? He did audibly make noise as deafness from birth meant that the capacity to form words through sound was much reduced, and instead simply gestured a greeting of loving familiarity.

Knock knock Who's there? Police Police who? You're under arrest, open up or we'll knock your door down

Why was the little girl crying? She got slapped with a porcupine.

What did the coach do to the player Coached the player

Why did the womens basketball team beat the mens? the men were locked in a refrigerator

Sorry boss

what do you do if you see an asian trip on a step? help him/her up and ask if their alright.

penis hehehehe

Knock knock Who's there A drummer A drummer who I'm not knocking on your door

There was this guy who walked in the bar with one shoe. The bartender asks what happened. The man said the shoe didn't fit. So the bartender ask where is the other shoe. The man said he threw it away. The bartender looks in the trashcan and sure enough he sees his other shoe. The bartender says "This is the same size as your other shoe. Why are you wearing one shoe?" The man says "I'm just playing a prank on you. There's a hidden camera over there and over there. Is it okay if I can put you on YouTube?" and the bartender says "No."

What happened when the lawyer pissed all over the judge? He was thrown off the case, causing him to go home, rape his wife, and put a bullet into his child's head.

What do you do when life gives you lemons? Life is an abstract object incapable of handing out gifts, thus if given a lemon by life you should go to a doctor to make sure you don't have an undiagnosed disease.

EVERYBODY THUMB THIS JOKE DOWN

A ninja walks into a bar the bartender asks "what would you like?" The ninja says "i'll have two green eyes" the bartender says "we dont have green eyes this is america" so the ninja is so mad that he goes home and brutally beats his wife with a spatula.

Knock Knock I don't have a door. I'm Homeless

The Irish man was sober.

#1 rule in arguments: if losing, start correcting their grammar

How many blind people does it take to screw in a light bulb? Does it matter?

1:Knock Knock 2:Who's there 1: Your cousin tyler He was then brought in with the rest of the family to celebrate Thanks giving.

Roses are red, Violets are black, Why is your chest, as flat as your back

how much is a microwave full of dead babies? a fridge full of dead puppies.

What do you call a Nazi in an airplane? Above sea level

It was just Michael J. Fox's birthday I wonder if he got in trouble for shaking his presents.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...