What came first: the chicken or the egg? God.

Why did the red head never have a boyfriend? She was a lesbian and had always preferred women over men

And so the poster says to the apple ........ Your not my dog

Do you know what a lion really is? It's an over sized cat.

What was the worst part about the Holocaust? -When it ended

Why couldn't Michael ask out Mary? Because Mary had been dead for dead for 10 years.

Yo mama so fat, she was accepted to a clinical trial for treatment of morbid obesity in middle-aged women.

How do you starve a black man? You don't feed him.

The prefix "con" means bad. The prefix "pro" means good. So what is the opposite of progress? Regress.

Why did the black man die? Because he fell off a cliff.

What was the dying boy's last wish? Not to die.

What did Steegers say when he lost his TARDIS? "The niggers stole it again!"

Why did the man shut up? because he was told to

knock knock! fu ck off i'm a shift worker trying to sleep

Q. Which is bigger, a dog or the Statue of Liberty? (Trick question! Think carefully before looking at the answer!) A. The Statue of Liberty.

Why was the little boy sad? Cause his mum died of a terminal illness. Why was the little girl sad? Cause she was his sibling.

A bear walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender knows that bears can't talk and realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and rolls over to tell his wife about the dream. She hears the joke, but turns away from him and pretends to be asleep. Then the bartender begins to cry. His marriage is in shambles.

what does an Ethiopian man say to greet a Chinese man well, first they must locate a translator fluent in both said languages, but they would most likely say hello

What do you call a man with multiple sexual partners? Well, first you strongly urge him to get tested for any contagious and potentially dangerous STD's that could have been transmitted from one partner's genitalia to another person's genitalia which could have very well been he himself. They could be life threatening. Oh, and call him by his first name.

What is a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick.

What's worse than finding a hair in your sandwitch? Finding a dead baby in your salad!

how do you double your cash? You rip it in half.

Mitch

Andy Warhol said we will all be famous for fifteen minutes. My soccer coach molested me and the trial was televised, they obscured my face and voice because I was twelve at the time.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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