Patient: Hey doc, I think I might have a tumor... Doc: Don't worry, it's all in your head.

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Jake: "Guys Apple's new phone is going to be curved." Bob: "Who makes curved phones?" Jake: "Apple."

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A bear walks into a bar and says to the barman "I'll have a pint of................ beer please." The barman says "why the big pause?"

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whats round red and taste like candy? such a thing doesn't exist

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A seal walks into a club.

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Imagine Buzz Lightyear standing on the edge of a cliff. He jumps off hoping to fly. He manages to glide for a little bit until a bird crashes into him a cause one of his wings to break. What happens then? Simply imagine him turning into bird.

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Why was Thomas Jefferson chosen to write the Declaration of Independence? He was an educated man and seemed suitable for said job.

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Why did the black guy cross the road? i have no idea but i hope he got to the other side safely.

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Jesus may have walked on water, but Stephen Hawking runs on batteries.

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"Lack of sleep" is that like... Sleep deprivation?

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Then lets give this another shot, this time we stop questioning how to make others happy, and if that is what makes us happy, then we ask: What else.

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Yidi Huang lives here.

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Three men stood before Saint Peter at the pearly white gates. They were then sent straight to Hell for committing mass suicide in hopes of reaching a higher state of being through a device located on a meteor.

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What is sad about four lawyers in a car driving of a cliff? The car fit six people.

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knock knock your nana had a cardiac arrest and thankfull dead now

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JFK

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Why couldn't Michael ask out Mary? Because Mary had been dead for dead for 10 years.

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69

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What's red, yellow, and full of diabetes? Mcdonalds

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Dear mom, I'm wearing skinny jeans. If I can't get them off, Neither can the rapist.

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What do you call it when a black guy runs down a hill? A male of African descent sprinting down a geographical landform that extends above the surrounding terrain.

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Why is the black guy unable to support his family? He's 3 years old.

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What does Helen Keller put at the end of every sentence? A period.

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What do you call a man with multiple sexual partners? Well, first you strongly urge him to get tested for any contagious and potentially dangerous STD's that could have been transmitted from one partner's genitalia to another person's genitalia which could have very well been he himself. They could be life threatening. Oh, and call him by his first name.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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