Terrorist walked into the bar, all dead, except for a small child. The police came and asked the boy: "Boy, how I survived the blast?" The boy answered: "I'm not a boy, I am broccoli"

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why did the mexican cross the road? To get into America. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was on its way to warn everyone that the sky was falling Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass. Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? cause he's Chuck Norris. Why did the man get a check in the mail every month? Cause he's black Why did Obama Cross the road? Cause he lost control of congress

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Your mama is so fat, her gravitational field varies with distance cubed!

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What did the college student say after he failed his test? He didn't say anything, he was a mute.

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Chuck Norris once went skydiving. his parachute did not deploy. where he landed is now known as the grand canyon

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What was the little boy doing in the deep end of the swimming pool? Drowning.

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Heartlight

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What do you call a sandwich that has sandwich on it? A sandwich.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, The Holocaust. And also cancer.

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Knock Knock Who's there? No one was there. It was two birds flew into the door and died.

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A man met a genie that granted him three wishes. I wish I could fly. The genie gave him a plane ticket. No, I want to really fly for real! The genie put him inside a plane. Okay, I wish I was unable to die then! The genie killed him. Moral: Not every story needs to make a fucking sense.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Penis... Okay...

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How do you kill a circus? Go for the Juggler!

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What's red and hurts you? A brick.

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Loading....please wait.

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If a man has a gun, but no arms or legs, is he armed?

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What did the man say when he was asked if he recently saw a mime painting a lawn chair in the middle of December? "No." , and walked away, slightly confused by the matter.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the other birds had taken hostage the chickens family.

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The WNBA

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toast points

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Why did the gay man's ass hurt? He has rectal cancer.

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Three women are on an airplane. One's a blonde, one's a redhead, and one's a brunette. Unfortunately, the plane was going to crash and there was nothing they could do but jump out and parachute to safety. So the captain said to each of the three ladies, "You can only take one of your possessions when you parachute out of the plane." The blonde says "I will take my watch becau--" But before she could finish her sentence the plane exploded because the flames on the wing had ignited the fuel tank. No one survived.

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why did the boy named rylie white get aids Because he had unprotected sex with someone with aids.

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Who can make 50 iPads in 1 hour? An Asian

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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