Why did the girl fall off the swing? She got shot.

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Why were little Suzie's parents crying? Suzie was kidnapped by Al Qeada

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? This isn't a car

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 has two penises

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There once was a man from Peru, Who fell into an extremely deep sleep and woke up just before he choked to death on his shoe rubber.

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i got angry and i was like " i really want to kick someone" ,my friend was on the ground and shes like "you can kick me" ,and i'm like "REALLY" ,then i kicked her really hard and she cried...

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two black guys are in a car. Whose driving? The question is too broad. Either one of those men or unmentioned people could be driving the car.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 has been sexually abusing 6 for all his life

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When you're climbing up a ladder and you feel something splatter, you may want to see what happened, and then promptly clean up the mess so one one slips.

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Why is this an anti-joke? Are you laughing? Exactly.

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Knock, Knock Who's there? The interrupting doctor The inter- You have cancer

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Why did Helen Keller's cat kill itself? It didn't, I did.

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Why did Jerry Sandusky go to the shower room? He hadn't showered all week and was beginning to smell.

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Parents: What do you want for your birthday? Boy: A yellow ping pong ball. 7th birthday P: What would you like for your birthday son? B: A yellow ping pong ball 13th birthday P: What would you like for you birthday son? B:A yellow ping pong ball. P:Hmm, fine. 17th birthday P: What would you like for your birthday son? B: A yellow ping pong ball. P: That's is I'm getting you a car! Day before 18th the boy drives into a bridge. He lies in his hospital bed and his parents are there. P: What would you like for you birthday tomorrow? B: A yellow ping pong ball. P: Fine. Why do you want these ping pong balls anyway? B: Because. And then he died.

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Whats better than winning a Paralympic Gold Medal? Having Legs.

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Penis

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What happened when the lawyer pissed all over the judge? He was thrown off the case, causing him to go home, rape his wife, and put a bullet into his child's head.

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Chuck Norris once went skydiving. his parachute did not deploy. where he landed is now known as the grand canyon

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Q: Who are the fastest readers? A: 9/11 jumpers 200 stories in 5 seconds

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Type 2 diabetics

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Two Penn-State Advisors walk into a butt.

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Why is a blonde a door knob... Because everybody gets a turn

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? Well i would imagine one of various names for a domesticated animal and she would choose the name based on her likes towards nature or an element of nature, being the educated individual she i would think she may name it base on a person of importance, such as an author or maybe a writer that inspires her.

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What do you call a gay woman who likes to smoke cigarettes? A lesbian with a possible nicotine addiction.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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