What did the cricket say to the bear when it entered it's den? Nothing,crickets comunicate by rubbing their back legs together to create vibrations and sound,and it cannot be understood by any other animal besides crickets.

I lost my tractor.

Why are the British so uptight? I don't think they are.

Why'd the chicken cross the road? Why? To get to the gay guys house. Knock Knock! Who's there? The chicken.

What do you call a women in the kitchen? A caterer

When does George Harrison take a shit? In the morning

Q: What's the quickest way to a woman's heart? A: Through her ribcage.

How do you fit 45 Jews into a car? 5 in the car 40 in the ashtray.

Q: What is the difference between a black man and a Park bench? A: A park bench is an inanimate object.

Roses are red my name is Dave this poem makes no sense, micorwave

Why did Lady Gaga arrive at the Grammy's in an egg? Because she was born that way.

What are the black specks in birdshit called? That's birdshit too.

what do men with small penises use as condoms? appropriately sized condoms.

knock knock who's there? i eat mop I eat mop who?

An Asian Woman is late and is driving her car very fast to her daughters wedding. She arrives at a reasonable time to witness the whole event.

Why can't Helen Keller Drive? Because she's dead.

How do you make a black man sad? You kill and mutilate his family maliciously

Knock Knock Who's there Nobody is here. This is just a feeble attempt of your subconsious to convince yourself you have someone who cares about you in the least bit to mask the horrible wretched pain of loneliness and suffering that is the enternal damnation of your life.

What's the difference between peanut butter and jelly ? Among many things, one is made with peanut butter, the other with fruits.

Two guys go hunting and one of them aims the sniper at the other guy's house and says "I see your wife's cheating on you again with another man" he replies "I've had it with her, shoot him in the privates and shoot her in the mouth" the friend says "I'll get that in one shot".

why did the feminist cross the road? To suck my D***

What's 1+1 2, dumbass...

what do you call a deer with no eyes? a deer...

Knock knock who's there? Screw this Screw this who? Im screwing this like ur boyfriend screwed you!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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