What do you do when a blond throws a grenade at you....you pull the pin and trow it back

If someone throws a fridge at the boy then they must be exceptionally strong because fridges weigh more than the average human can lift therefor he has a good future ahead of him but will have to live with the fact that he hurt a small child

How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? With teamwork and coordination, each could place one foot on the seat, and they can all stand up using each other for balance and support. The fact that they are gay in unimportant.

Why didn't the boy go to school? He was sick.

why do woman travel in packs? because men don't travel like the sisterhood in the traveling pants

Why did it take so long for the baby's to paint my wall? I didn't throw them hard enough.

Why couldnt the kid see the pirate movie? Because he didn't have eyes.

if life gives you lemons...chuck them back and say i wanted muffins instead!!!!

Roses are red violets are blue a face like yours belongs in a zoo don't be sad cause I'll be there to not in the cage but laughing at you

Roses are red. Violets are blue. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father, prepare to die.

yo mamma's so stupid, she is not that smart.

Knock knock. Who's there? Your neighbour. My neighbour who? Timothy, welcome to the neighbourhood!

Why'd the aborted fetus cross the road? 9/11

What's the cutest thing about a redhead? I know, I couldnt think of anything either

A young man spent his summer as an intern at a school. He eventually became a real estate agent but it was a pretty cool experience.

a black guy walks into a fast food place.

What's green and has wheels? Grass, I was joking about the wheels.

Why did Sally fall off the swing-set? She had no arms. Knock-knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

There once was a man from Peru. He dreamt he was eating his shoe. He woke with a fright, In the middle of the night, To find a man had murdered his wife and children.

What did the man say to his brother? Nothing, because he just died in a tragic car crash.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, it was kind of by chance that it crossed the road and what is the big deal lots of animals cross the road. For example possums, squirrels, deer, raccoons, cats, dogs, rabbits do pretty often too it's weird because sometimes more rabbits cross the road on Easter I don't know if that's just me though, chipmunks, bears, over in Africa probably tigers and lions cross those roads.

Why did Jimmy go to the doctor? He had just been hit by a semi truck and his legs were severed. He died later that night.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Although this is a highly improbable scenario, one would assume that, being a chicken, it did not have much of an intuitive idea as to what to do while it was stray for whatever reason in an urbanized area. Considering chickens do not harbor nearly as much of a mental capacity as it would require to even comprehend the concept of a "road" and is impervious to the idea of oncoming traffic and such, the fact that it happened to be crossing the road was in fact not even recognized by the chicken. For this reasons I deem this question unanswerable.

What do you call a mexican riding a lawnmower? Promoted

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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