What did the dog say when the woman put a sweater on him? Nothing, dogs can't talk and he has no idea what is going on

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What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: he has a disabling disease. It's called ALS.

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Helen got hit by a bus. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Helen!!

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How do you punish Helen Keller? By grounding her.

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Why did Jerry Sandusky go to the shower room? He hadn't showered all week and was beginning to smell.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot had a seizure.

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A man buys a kitten from the store. He gets home, takes it out of its cage, and realizes that it wasn't the kitten he wanted. He then returns to the store and exchanges for the kitten he originally wanted, but then decides to keep both because he is feeling particularly hungry.

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Why was the boy crying? Because his parents were in a car crash and died and his grandparents were already dead and he got cancer for christmas. And he had no testicles

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Q: Why didnt the irishman walk out of the bar? A: He died of severe alchoholism and had a heart attack and died istantly

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Q. What do you call a small hen that can't lay eggs properly? A. A small hen that can't lay eggs properly.

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There are two gingerbread men in an oven and the one says " it's hot in here" the other says "holy crap it's a talking cookie!!!!!!!!"

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what ya call e dong withb eyes peeneyes

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what do you call a newborn baby? anything you want.

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A man walks into a bar. Q: What's the apple doing on your head? A: Peach? It's not pear. It's banana.

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where are you?

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Kenny died. The Bastards.

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what's funnier than 3 dead babies in a trashcan pretty much anything thats not funny

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Why was the boy embarrassed when he opened his parents' bedroom door? Because he had been trying the door for several minutes until he realized he was pushing instead of pulling.

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What do u call a black rapper who only raps about sex and money? lil wayne

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Q. why was Martin Luther King assassinated? A. he wasn't his son was

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Why didn't the man cross the road? He was paralyzed.

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why did the bear fall out of the tree? the bear got shot

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What is the difference between a black guy and a road? One you put tar on and the other one is a road

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A Jew and a German walk in a bar. they've accepted their peoples past and learned to move on with their lives

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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