What did the man with scissors do? He cut his balls off.

A man walks into a zoo. There is only one animal, a dog. It's a shitzu.

What's worse than losing something? Dieing.

i cannot get my penis to rise to the occasion, it is the holocaust tho..

Q: How many 3 go into the number 102,351? A: Yes.

What did I do last night?work

how many dead babys can fit in a bathtub 17

Whats worse than getting dirt on your brand new J's Finding your girlfriend cheating on you with your Great Dane and realizing that he dose her better than you.

Knock,knock whose there? The pizza delivery guy the pizza delivery guy who the pizza delivery guy who didnt give you your pizza

Knock Knock. Who's there? A cannibal. WHAT?! You are about to die and be eaten.

An owl and a squirrel are sitting in a tree, watching a farmer go by. The owl turns to the squirrel and says nothing, because owls can't talk. The owl then eats the squirrel because it's a bird of prey.

Where do babies come from? My garage

The weels on the bus go...flat

What's the difference between a dead baby and a Ferrarri? A dead baby is a non-living human, while a Ferrarri is a brand of car.

Q: What's better than ice cream? A: Two ice creams! Q: What's better than 2 ice creams? A: Still two ice creams!

What do you call a dancing panda bear? I'm not sure, but panda bears are pretty big, so the possibility of them dancing is highly unlikely.

Where did Martha go after the explosion? Everywhere.

The early bird gets the worm, but the angry bird gets the pig.

fjdkhg

Roses are red, violets are blue. Cassidy's a whore so open the door.

Yo momma's so dirty that she washes her hands with anti-bacterial soap.

a kangaroo walks in to a bar and sits down. Kangaroo's live in Auustralia

I've had amnesia as long as I can remember

Why do black people like fried chicken? There's cocaine inside.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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