A man walks into a hospital with a panicked expression, and rushes to his doctor's office. "Doctor, I am in tremendous pain when I breath!" "Hmm, seems to be a lung problem, take one of these antibiotics twice a day." "Thank you so much!" "Oh yah! Your family was brutally killed in a sixteen car pile up."

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What happened when a boy used the wrong punctuation and grammar, plus forgot how to spell the word know? i dont ;now!!!!!!!!!

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what do you call a gay bird a gaybird

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What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? People leading healthy, active lives physically and socially.

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Call me a banana. You're a banana. No I'm not

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Why was the boy sad? He had just been in a terrible car accident in which he witnessed his entire family die painful, violent deaths, thus he suffered survivor's guilt. Also he dropped his ice cream.

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What do you call a black man in the olympics? An olympian.

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why did the imagrant cross the road the cops were on his tail for false identity of the chicken

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Why did the Jewish man dive into the street to pick up a penny? He was Tevye, a character from the famous play Fiddler on the Roof and pennies are valuable and rare in Tsarist Russia in 1905.

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why was 6 afraid of 7? He's not.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? As much as he wants to.

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whats worse than being ugly? being aivy.

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what glows blue and howls at the moon at midnight? I dont know but i had sex with your mother.

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what's funnier than a dead baby in a clown costume? philanthropy

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding 2 worms in your apple.

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You know what really grinds my gears? Shifting into "park" before my car's fully stopped.

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What's worse than rush hour traffic? Your childhood friend, Ricky, was just brutally killed by a street cleaner

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GONNA

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How does a penguin make pancakes out of skis? Purple because it's the best.

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Whats worse than an old guy? An old woman!

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Yo mamma's so old she is dead.

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Why was the boy praying? Because both of his parents had just been brutally murdered in front of him and he was analy defiled by the assailant and left alive to have live with the pain of seeing both of his parents be killed. He had also dropped his lollipop.

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Why did the little boy throw his clock out of the window? After hours of searching for the snooze button to no avail, the little boy became so irritated at the incessant ringing of the alarm that he threw it out of his window in a fit of rage. The clock landed on an old woman who was walking twenty stories below. She was immediately killed on impact.

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If you challenge the tarsier to a staring contest, it wouldnt undersand a word you say, but it would stare at you when you would think that was apropos. the tarsier wouldnt really think anything and would just make a peepee

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops