Q: Wanna hear a dirty joke? A: Your mother sucks.

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A girl dropped her pencil while sitting next to her bf... She glanced at his phone while he was texting a message that said "I love you"... The girl jumped up and called him every name she could think of and left the room... The message was to his mother! She didn't listen and left him... He killed himself because she left him... She killed herself because he killed himself... Moral of the story: Don't drop you pencil!

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"We have such clean water we drink and do a lot of other stuff with it" The American said. "What other stuff do you do with your clean water" The African Child said. "Well we take showers in and we go to bathroom with it" The American said. "So let me get this straight you even take a Shit in it to" The African Child said.

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patty was in sunday school, the teacher asked her "patty who created the universe?" john sliped into the seat next to her and jabbed her with a pen "LORD ALMIGHTY" the teacher said' good patty now who gave himself for us? john again jabbed her with a pin "JESUS CHRIST" "that very good patty now what did mary say to joseph after they had their 23 child?" john jabbed her " IF YOU STICK THAT DAMN THING IN ME ONE MORE TIME ILL BREAK IT IN HALF!!!" the teacher fainted

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When a suicide-bomber when to heaven what did Allah give him apart from 72 virgins? 72 mothers in law.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was a woman...

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If your canoe is stuck in a tree, in the middle of august, with no headlights, how many pancakes does it take to get to the moon? A: None, snakes dont have armpits :D

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What's red and smells like cherries Cherries

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What's funny about the holocaust? Nothing. Whoever thinks the holocaust is funny is a dick.

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Why is Roenz Gay? He isnt.

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Black people are ugly. They should not live in this world. They are apes. They should live as apes not humans. Why do they have ugly curly hair, fat lips, and a big flat nose? SO UGLY!! EWW

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Q: What do you call a white guy cooking a dinner? A: A chef

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An Hispanic married couple walked into a popular restaurant. The waiter arrived at their table and asked what they would like to eat. The husband ordered a steak and his wife ordered a salad. They both enjoyed their food, payed the bill and happily walked out of the restaurant.

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Im So Hood... That When I go Shopping, I Buy Sweatshirts with Hoods

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Q: What do you call a bunch of blondes standing ear to ear? A: A wind tunnel!

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who is awesome? no one...

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a man walked into a bar.... when i say bar i mean a metal pole, the man suffered from concussion

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What does this and this have in common , wait I was meant to put pictures up, aww

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God is almighty, as such he ANSWERS TO NO ONE! Moral: What you praying for then bitch?

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Why did the golfer wear two pair of trousers? Because he's a wanker

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How do you make a Plumber cry? Kill his family.

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What's white and looks like a refrigerator? A baseball

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A Guy walks into a Bar, has a good time and leaves

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Why don't women know how to drive a car? Because there are no roads between the kitchen and the bedroom.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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