What do you get when you cross an owl and a bungie cord? My ass.

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What do you get when mix an orange with juice? Orange juice.

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What's big, grey and can't climb a tree? A parking lot

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Why did the man rob a bank? Because he was poor.

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Knock knock! Who's There? @HurricaneKris4 on Twitter Ok I'll follow you...

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this is the part where we na na na na every good song needs a na na na na wake up at night screaming na na na na my grandmothers nickname is nana

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What is the difference between a duck? It can neither ride a bike.

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how do you make a blonde snowman? hollow out the head.

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How do you get a black man to use a condom? You explain to him all the benefits of safe sex.

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This schoolteacher was taking her first golfing lesson. She scored poorly from her lack of practice and experience and was turned off from the sport.

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-What did the snake say to the mouse? Nothing. Animals can't talk dumbass.

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-Have you ever eaten Ethiopian food? -No -Niether have they

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A man walks into a bar. We see him as he approaches the register wearing a dark hoody. The surveillance camera seen here catches a glimpse of the man's face appearing to be a white male with mustache and beard. As you can see the man opens the register and takes the money before the bartender can get to him. If you have any information about this crime please call crime stoppers at 1-800-GET-HELP. In other news, the DOW JONES reached a record high today as investors in China begin working on keeping the economy from plundering.

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Why did the man fall down? He got shot

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Why did the Jew die? Because Hitler was born...

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Two penguins are in a bathtub, one penguin asks the other "can you pass the soap?" the other penguin says "what do I look like? A toaster?"

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Whats hairless, looks like a bel end and stinks of onions. Adey Bradley

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What did the Farmer say to his tractor? Most likely his life story, Farmers arn't always the most popular.

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Where did Sheyanne go during the bombing...... Everywhere

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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a gay guy walks into a bar what does he do? buys a drink after a hard day at work

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if a cat is mean and a dogs a bitch then what do u call your wife? A MEAN ASS BITCH

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Knock Knock . . . I'm coming in!

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I'm a like whore

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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