Q) Whats wet fishy and gets caught by fishermen? A) fish.

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Roses are red Violets are blue So is your face Cuz I just gagged you

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Whats Black and White all Over? Ask Your Mother

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Whats the difference between Lady Gaga and a man? Nothing. I was lying about their being a difference.

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What do a grape and a plane have in common? They both have wings... except for the grape!

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Why is a banana yellow? I don't know, ask a scientist, stupid

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Whats better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded

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A blond and a redhead are walking down the street the red head says look a dead bird the blond looks up

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If an atom bomb falls in a town, does it make a sound? Not to most people, as they would be killed in a massive catastrophe that will be etched into their ancestors minds for years to come, not to mention radiation poisoning and deformation.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Open the fucking door. Open it! This is a fucking robbery. This is not a fucking joke. Get down on the ground. Shut that baby up. Shut that fucking baby up! Now! Get on the fucking ground or I swear to Christ I will fucking end your life. Tell the kids to go to their room. Do it. Do it, you fucking bitch! Where's the fucking jewelry? You got any money stashed anywhere? Come on, I know it's here. Keys? Your husband got any guns? Give me everything valuable or I swear to god, I will fucking murder you in front of your son. The woman was brutally raped for hours.

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I had my period 3 days ago.

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A fat guy walks into a bar and the bartender says, "the regular?" The fat man replies, "actually this time I wanna try something different."

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Ring. Ring. Hello? Hey, It's Sean Oh hi! How are you?

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What's the difference between a Jew that is half Jewish and a Jew that is fully Jewish? 1/2

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Michael Hoffman leaves the gym

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Why did Hanna fall of the swing She had no arms or legs Knock knock Whose there Not Hanna Haha

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What did the person say to the person about to run into the tree? Watch out for that tree!

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Knock Knock! Who's there? What do you mean... we have been having a conversation for a half hour now... that's your name you idiot, Knock Knock!

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What is cold? Winter

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guy 1: hey, i got a new dog. isn't he cute? guy 2: i just lit him on fire

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have AD i love squirrels

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Woman's rights.

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What did the cop say to the people watching the house fire? All right nothing to see here jokes over

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I was going to tell my mom an anti-joke. Then she died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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