I accidentally washed my white Labrador retriever with three red shirts and my Red Sox baseball cap. When I went to move the laundry, the dog was drowned.

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There are four worms walking in a straight line. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The fourth worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied!

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A boy was constantly getting bullyed at school... so he went home

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whats green and has wheels? grass i lied about the wheels

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yo momma so fat that she's fat

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2 snare drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff.... ba dooom chesh

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THERES AN APP FOR ANTI JOKES ? now thats not funny !

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What's worse than finding a fly in your drink? Gonorrhea.

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OMG this totally works! Step 1: Hold your breath Step 2: Die

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Three monkeys are sitting in a tree. Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? -He was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? -He was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? -Peer pressure.

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what has 50 legs, but can't walk? half of a centipede

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Q: Why did the Mexican jump over the fence? A: He went to go retrieve the ball that was kicked in his neighbor's yard. Afterwords, he continued playing soccer with his friends.

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An asian loses to you in starcraft..

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If no means yes and yes means no, what is yes? Yes

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Q:If pigs ever played basketball, then what sound would they make? A:Oink-oink

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How do you drown a blond? Keep her head underwater until her lungs fill with water and her bodily functions stop working.

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roses are red, violets are red, my garden is on fire

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what did the farmer say to the cowgirl that made her positive that she had a weird laugh? you have a weird laugh.

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How many dead babies fit into a bathtub? I honestly don't know, as I have never tested this out, nor do I plan to because I would like to not handle the bodies of poor deceased infants.

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There was an Irishman and an Australian who walked into a bar. There was also an American, who didn't. Why didn't the American walk into the bar? He was a midget.

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why does'nt mexico have an olympic team? because they have a poor economy and have other things to worry about.

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Two tubes of ice cream are sitting in a freezer, one turns to the other and says "its bloody freezing in here" God then corrects this apparent mistake in the combined laws of physics and biology

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What do you call 100 black people at the bottom of the ocean? An unfortunate tragedy and astonishingly ironic curcumstance.

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buttcrack thumbs up

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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