A duck walked into a bar. He asked for a drink and the bartender gave him it

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how much wood can a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood three wood

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? 7 has been charged on 3 accounts of 2nd degrees murder and 6 fears for his life.

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A man with a gun walks into a bar. The police are called and the man was killed quickly.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass, I was joking about the wheels.

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How do you have sex with hellen keller? Very sweetly

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So a Quadriplegic walks into a bar.....

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died.

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Why did Sally fall off of the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock. Whose there? Not Sally.

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George Michael walks into a bathrom.....

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There were two oranges in a bowl. One orange said to the other "Hello my orange friend". The other orange screamed because he did not know oranges could talk.

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So a bunch of blondes are in a group and a murder comes by and sais, "if you want to live, answer a question right." so the blondes pick there smartest on. the first question is, what is 9+4... the blonde answers five, the crowd goes "give her another chance giver her another chance, same thing happens, she gets it wrong and the crowd goes "give her another chance, give her another chance." the murderer sais "ok fine this is your final guess, what is 2+2" the blonde goes "uuhhhhhh... 4?" And the whole crowd goes "give her another chance give her another chance

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what did batman say to robin before they got in the batmobile "robin, get in the batmobile"

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Did you hear about the blonde that went to college? She got a degree.

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Why can't Helen Keller Drive? Because she's dead.

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Why can't the blonde dial 911? Because the burglars tied her up and gagged her before they robbed the house and she couldn't do anything until one of the neighbors found her and untied her.

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Knock knock Who's there? Sergeant Sergeant who? Sergeant John Clancy. I regret to inform you that Billy your son has just unfortunately been killed in the electronic fan factory in which he works.

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what do you say to someone acting like an idiot? hey, if you keep acting like an idiot im gunna hit you with a freakin bat , you stupid fubu!

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A blond and a redhead are walking down the street the red head says look a dead bird the blond looks up

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What's the difference between a Jew that is half Jewish and a Jew that is fully Jewish? 1/2

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Whats red and smells like blue paint? Nothing really

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How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two.

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What did the blanket say when it fell off the bed Nothing it is a sentient object and doesn't have the capability to talk

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Why couldn't the girl throw the baseball over the fence? She had no arms.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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