What do you call a kid on crutches? Crippled

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Knock knock, Who's there? To get to the other side

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What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a lawyer? This would be unlikely to happen, as it would cut the story short.

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Did you hear about the new pirate movie? It was rated PG-13.

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I have read and agree to the Terms of Service

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Q: What did one dog say to the other dog? A: "Bitch!"

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Toilet Sex, Toilet Sex I Love Toilet Sex!

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what happens when two small children jump into a pool full of pedophiles? They splash around and have fun

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What do you call someone who takes a toaster into their bath? Adele's number one fan.

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Stephen Hawking raped your mom

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Your mother is so unintelligent that her IQ score is equal to or lower than 2 standard deviations below the national average of 100 on the Mensa approved intelligence test that has been properly administered and supervised.

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Why did sally fall of the swing? SHE HAD NO ARMS!

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What's funny about 9/11? Nothing.

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How many Jews does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1

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What's worse than dropping your ice cream? Being Killed

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Q: what weighs 6 ounces sits in a tree and is very deadly? A: a sparrow with a machine gun

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Q: What do you call a black preist? A: Father

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A white guy, a black guy, and a Spanish guy jump off of a building. Due to acceleration of gravity, they hit the ground at a fast speed and die.

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What looks like a dick? A penis

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An old bear-wrestler dies and finds himself at the pearly gates. Confused and at a loss for words due to the unfamiliar circumstance and lack of public toilets, he blurts out "Saint Peter, I presume?" but it was just the train conductor. "Ticket please." He searched his pockets and finally found the ticket. He wished he had a dog, but not a seeing-eye dog because people would assume he was blind. This story illustrates the importance of situational awareness, remembering which pocket you put your ticket in, and not forgetting to go before you leave because you don't know when you'll be able to find a restroom.

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whats blue and fuzzy?.... blue fuzz

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My mom caught me masturbating.

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Why couldn't the baby boy read the book? He had eye cancer and was therefore blind.

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A: Have you ever heard of a blue waffle? B: Yes, i eat them every morning... A: DO you REALLY know what a blue waffle is? B: Yes...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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