how much wood can a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood three wood

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A man walked into a bar and it hurt.

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women playing football?

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What do a grape and a plane have in common? They both have wings... except for the grape!

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Why can't Helen Keller Drive? Because she's dead.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple finding half a worm in your apple.

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Whats the difference between an apple and an orange? A banana because a motorcycle has no windows.

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Two 50 year old men walk into eachother on the street. one was born in a hobo shack and another was born in a mansion. what did the rich one say to the poor one? Hi, whats your name?

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Why did the fat prick post on the internet? Because he was MorningAfterBoy

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What did the left nut say to the right nut? Nothing

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What did the fish say? Moo

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Roses are grey Violets are grey Everything is grey I'm colorblind

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have AD i love squirrels

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I had my period 3 days ago.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Open the fucking door. Open it! This is a fucking robbery. This is not a fucking joke. Get down on the ground. Shut that baby up. Shut that fucking baby up! Now! Get on the fucking ground or I swear to Christ I will fucking end your life. Tell the kids to go to their room. Do it. Do it, you fucking bitch! Where's the fucking jewelry? You got any money stashed anywhere? Come on, I know it's here. Keys? Your husband got any guns? Give me everything valuable or I swear to god, I will fucking murder you in front of your son. The woman was brutally raped for hours.

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What is the difference between an Irishman and a plank of wood? Almost everything, including anatomy, chemical make up, mass etc

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Friends are a lot like snow You pee on them, they disappear

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nick biggs ate a car well his name is nick BIGGS

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What's the difference between a Jew that is half Jewish and a Jew that is fully Jewish? 1/2

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A black man walks out of a store with a receipt.

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drake

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How do you fit 45 Jews into a car? 5 in the car 40 in the ashtray.

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How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two.

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John is typing... *2 seconds later" John: Hi

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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