A blind man walks into a bar with a guide dog in one hand and his girlfriend in the other. The bartender says "Nice dog." The blind man says "Thanks."

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Buy one packet of condoms for the price of two packets of condoms, and you will be given a second packet of condoms ABSOLUTLEY FREE!

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A dog is walking down the street. The dog catcher promptly arrives and takes him to the pound. Two months later the dog is in a new, happy home with a wonderful family.

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Joseph had been temporarily blinded for over a year. While blind, he saw the doctor who told him he would regain sight the next morning when he woke up. For this special moment, Joseph decided that the first thing he wanted to see was his wife. So, his wife decided to stay up all night so she was in the right position for when Joseph woke up. However, when Joseph woke up and opened his eyes his wife wasn't there so he was a little bit annoyed.

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A Mexican and a black guy are in a car. Who's driving? The Mexican.

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whats an orphans favorite memory? Not one with his/her parents! PWNED TO ALL YOU ORPHANS OUT THURRRRR!!!!

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Q: What do you call a women with 2 bowling pins? A: A women with 2 bowling pins.

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obama's promises

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Roses are angry Violets are too My head is scratchy I need shampoo

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Why was the baby smoking? He was locked in a hot car.

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IT WAS NEVER YOURS TO TAKE!

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women's rights.

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What a russian says to another russian? I don't know, but it must be somthing in russian.

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Why did the dinosaur cross the road? It didn't, there were no roads back then

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iPhone's. Amirite? That's not even an anti-joke. Just a joke.

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Whats the difference between a walnut and a baby ? Ones fun to hit with a hammer and the other is a walnut

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What's round and red? A red and round solid.

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Why was Little Billy crying? He had an axe embedded in his chest.

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Whats funnier than a Dead Baby in a bathtub? Nothing Thats as good as it gets!

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Dory from Finding Nemo: "Hey, I just met you, and this is crazy- Hey, I just met you."

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How does Stevie Wonder pick up girls? He doesnt, he has someone do it for him

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what did the man do when he went to save the other man from drowning? drowned with him...

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how do you make a family tan? You burn them in the house.

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What's the difference between a pancake? They both taste good with jam

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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