Q: Do you know what Lady Gaga make for his birthday? A: A party

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What do you call a black man forcing two young girls into his car with a gun? A Police Officer.

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A man with no legs walks into a bar.

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Why did the woman walk into the men's clothing store? She's a lesbian. Why did the man walk into the womens clothing store? He had to buy his mom a birthday present.

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take out the f in way. there is no f in way. I see what you did there.

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Q. What did the fat guy get for his birthday? A. diabetes

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How do you kill a fashion icon? First make sure their blonde and stupid like most. then take a barstool preferably or what ever is closest then........ WACK HER IN THE EMPTY SPOT WHERE HER BRAIN SHOULD BE.

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A giant watermelon falls on a man He's dead

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Why do mexicans have so many children??? Because condoms resemble skinny balloons.

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Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, you should be a con artist.

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How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? With teamwork and coordination, each could place one foot on the seat, and they can all stand up using each other for balance and support. The fact that they are gay in unimportant.

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A woman walks out of the kitchen, she gets slapped by her sexist husband.

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What was the doctor's shirt made out of? Cotton

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a man asked another man what time its it. The man responded by telling him the time and asking why he wanted to know. "thats none of your business" he replied. Why did he say it was none of his business? A- because it was none of his business.

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What is worse than finding a worm in an apple? The Holocaust

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read this

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A man walks into a bar, and orders a drink. He reaches into his back pocket, but cannot find his wallet. The man was pick pocketed by a skilled thief on his walk to the bar. The man quickly makes calls to cancel his credit cards and minimize the financial loss.

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Dani barton= lovely

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See now that is confident and down to earth, reasonable, and all the etc etc`s, so what would you like me to fill them in with? Joking aside, you are smart, funny, you take a beating (sorry that`s today`s new low point, I have never hit a woman and never will, sure I punched down the GigaLesb when she lifted me up and my spine started making cracking noises, but that does not technically count as a woman). You are sweet, you are cute, you are funny, you are hot hot hot (hattrick see?), and yeah yeah if you want me to prove to people here that we know each other, sure, I met you once like 15 years ago? You kinda adored me, I could not take my eyes of yours (oh yeah, you got adorable eyes sure), and... You got huge breasts (Tits are more like those hanging you know what I mean) Sigh sometimes a boy wonders what he is doing with his life, he falls for the strangest girls... ...AND THEN SAID BOY FINDS HIMSELF BROKEN IN TWINE BY ME!

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A black woman sits down in the front of a bus.

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How tall is the grass in Germany? ZIS HIGH! *put hand about an inch and half off the ground* I mow it about every ozher week

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If she's old enough for jail, than shes old enough to rail.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the gay man's house. Knock knock... Who's there? The Chicken

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So my girlfriend says I'm a pedophile. What does she know she's nine.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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