What did the young boy get for christmas? Parental divorce

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A man runs over a woman with his car, whose fault was it? The woman's for trying to cross the street in the dark without a crosswalk.

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Patrick- hey spongebob i thought of something even funnier then 24 Spongebob- What patrick- 25

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What is the difference between a doorknob? Toast.

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Two cannibals were eating a clown. One says to the other "Does this taste funny to you?!" ...Two days later, both of the cannibals became very ill with food poisoning. Always ensure meat is cooked thoroughly before eating.

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Two muffins are in an oven. The first muffin says, "Boy it's hot in here." The second says, "It sure is." Both muffins then faint from heat exhaustion and are eaten to death when taken out of the oven And thus tragically, the world would never know of the spectacular talking muffins.

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What did the innocent little girl get for Christmas? Lymphoma.

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I can't remember if I have Azheimer's or not.

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How much does a mexican immigrant get paid? Less an minimum wage.

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Whats big, yellow and red? a school bus with a bunch of dead children.

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Q: What do you get when you cross and owl with a bungie cord? A: My ass

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Juggling lions and breast feeding.

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What's brown and sticky? ...A stick.

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A man walks up to a horse and asks, "why the long face?" The horse stares back at him, blankly. The man then sits and ponders his life, sad that he now tries to communicate with horses and realizes that his eccentricity is probably the reason his marriage failed.

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Why is the fat kid laying on the ground crying? Because I hit him with a shovel

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What did the priest say to the kid? You can tell your dog but nobody else, ok?

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Whats worse than the holocaust? 2 holocausts

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How do you get 1000 pokemon on to a bus? Pikachu!

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Having sexaual relations with your own mother.

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A mexican Police officer walks into a crime scene. "Ouch." he exclaims, rubbing his forehead where a red bump is already surfacing.

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John has 38 candy bars. He eats 28. What does he have now? Diabetes. John has Diabetes.

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What the difference between water and water? Nothing, they're both water.

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Why was Hellen Kellers leg yellow? Because her dog was blind too.

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How many carrots can you fit in a truck Depends who's driving

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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