roses are red violets are blue count my five damn finger , and the third one is for you!!!!!!!!

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George Michael walks into a bathrom.....

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what's worse than finding out god isn't real? finding out he is

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? A bike that his father paid for with the salary he made as an accountant at a local bank.

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Your mom is such a slut, she had unprotected sex at least once.

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Women's rights

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what do you get when you combine a cat and a dog? nothing since it is impossible to combine a cat and a dog

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What did the cat say when you rub it's stomach? Nothing because felines don't have the needed vocal organs to speak, and probaly wouldn't know english do to the size of there brain.

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Did the chicken cross the road? No because it was in a fenced in area like all farm animals should be

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Why was the skeleton afraid to cross the road? He wasn't, and in fact was entirely unaware that said road existed given the fact that he was deceased; and therefore lacked any sensory organs and motor functions associated with crossing roads.

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What's black and white, and red all over ? A penguin in a blender.

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How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irishman? None.

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Knock knock Who's there Your son and his vagina.

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A blonde, a Brunette and a Redhead walk into a bar. They all buy a drink and talk about their days.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To see his brother im dying of leukemia.

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Whats blue and flies? A suffocating baby strapped to a fan.

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Your mom is absolutely pefect. This makes me love HIM.

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I know a black girl named beyonca.

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No, but it was a nice chance to pretend to, that was the scheme part I might have mentioned, people never figure out that you are fucking them over at the present, if you tell them you fucked them off in the past, they start thinking backwards, often ignoring those tiny details straight in front of them. Listen, call me a bit paranoid, but who the hell is Septimus and AzureDragon or whatever the fuck his little geek name was?

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knock knock who's there? i eat mop I eat mop who?

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Yo mamas so fat

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no

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Why couldn't Jenny speak right? Cause she had autism.

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A baptist priest walks into a bar with a boner.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops