What did santa claus say when he saw a girl standing on the corner? Ho Ho Ho... ;)

Parents: What do you want for your birthday? Boy: A yellow ping pong ball. 7th birthday P: What would you like for your birthday son? B: A yellow ping pong ball 13th birthday P: What would you like for you birthday son? B:A yellow ping pong ball. P:Hmm, fine. 17th birthday P: What would you like for your birthday son? B: A yellow ping pong ball. P: That's is I'm getting you a car! Day before 18th the boy drives into a bridge. He lies in his hospital bed and his parents are there. P: What would you like for you birthday tomorrow? B: A yellow ping pong ball. P: Fine. Why do you want these ping pong balls anyway? B: Because. And then he died.

Dylan Hodge likes to lick his mums penis to sleep every night.

How do you fix America's national security issues? Nuke russia

How do you kill a blonde? you shoot her.

Knock knock. Who's there? John John who John

Cold camel scrotum.

how many large people can you fit in a bath tub ... 1/16

I baked you a pie! Oh boy! What flavor? Apple.

What did Liberia say to Texas? Tag, you're it!

Why did the blonde kill herself? She was diagnosed with major depression and was dealing with a lot of traumatic events in her life.

Why wouldn't the man in a wheelchair see out the window? The curtains were closed

Society.

how do you get to your favorite chinese restaurant? Wok.

A dentist, a librarian, a construction worker, a gynecologist, a zookeeper, a shoemaker, a terrorist, a politician, a cyclist, a truck driver, a kangaroo, a Mexican, a blonde, a Jewish black guy, a Honda Civic, a monkey, a penguin, an FBI agent, a stock broker, a president of a foreign country, a CEO of a very wealthy company regarding AIDS, a founder of one of top downloaded apps in the market, a chief executive, a cook, a waitress, a priest, a nun, a little boy, a fairy, a dinosaur, and a skeleton walks into a bar. There's no punchline.

What's one thing good about cancer? (make them guess) Nothing you fricking prick!

Hgiugsf s8dyfgc sdyhgd©•øˆ????ª•†®???ßßs cdiug dvyg 34t5 fd87 vrry utgg erug 46 5gtyrue fVTU? Tree.

Why do white people despise black people? Because they are good at everything we suck at.

Whats worse than blue balls? Green Balls.

Q: whats up? A: radiation levels in japan

2 men shot up a morgue, 16 bodies remain dead

A brunette, a blonde, and a redhead walk into a bar. There is also a woman with black hair standing outside, and the man next to her is bald.

How long did it take for Michael to screw in the lightbulb? 37 minutes. Michael has cerebral palsy.

Why did the black man order a bucket of Kentucky Fried Chicken? His wife just died in a tragic car accident and he is a horrible cook.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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