there are 2 sausages in a pan. one sausage says "wow it's hot in here" and the other sausage says "MY GOD A TALKING SAUSAGE!!!!"

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Student; Miss, please may I go toilet? Teacher; Yes, but say your alphabet first. Student; Ok

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Abe Lincoln, George Washington, George Bush and Barack Obama are sitting at a table at a bar. They all realize that none of them know each other, wonder when in time they are, have mental breakdowns, and run screaming into the night.

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why didn't the printer work? it was in the toilet.

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Yolo: Your Oppurtunity Lies Upon...... oh, wait upon starts with a u... YOLU

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why was the boy sad He had a frog stapled to his face

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Why did Helen Keller cross the road? To end her misery.

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Whats worse than a Worm in Your Apple? Being raped

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If you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, a poor african child probably has nothing and is starving to death while you and Chuck debate on how to spend your five dollars.

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How do you make Al Gore cry? Kill his daughter.

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If we all evolved from apes. Abbie didnt go that far

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1. A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: ''Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!'' The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: ''The driver just insulted me!'' The man says: ''You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I'll hold your monkey for you.''

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YO MAMA SO SHORT she should really consider wearing long tunic-like blouses, prints that contain vertical stripes, and heeled shoes with a pointed toe in order to create the illusion of length to her silhouette. That having been said, society's limited definition of beauty is quite inadequate for the diverse world in which we live.

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Your mom.

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Q:Whats worse than a worm in apple? A:The Holocaust. Q: What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? A: Were both lawyers! :D Q: What happens when you throw a purple rock in to a green river? A: It splashes

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What is black but also yellow? A song.

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how do you make a dead baby float? take your foot off its head.

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why do elephants eat peanuts? so they can save the wrappers for valuable prizes

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It's easy to take part, just type your text below!

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What is worse than a bunch of babies stapled to a tree? A bunch of trees stapled to a baby.

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Why are children like books? They are highly flammable if covered in gasoline.

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Emily Brunelle is skinny

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What starts with a P and ends with a O-R-N? Popcorn

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Q:If a lesbian woman is wearing a jean jacket, high heels, camouflage shorts, and sunglasses, what gender is she ? A: Sheep.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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