Q: How do all 5 gay guys walk? A: In One Direction

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A man walks into a bar and orders a water. He then drinks his water and leaves. The following day he returns to the bar and again orders a water. He repeats this for many days until finally one day the bartender asks him why he comes every day to just drink water. The man replies, "Water is free. I got laid off from my job last week. Rough economy, you know." The bartender starts charging him for water, and the man becomes homeless.

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Okay, So a Cow, a Lumberjack and a Fireman walk into a bar. The cow asks the bartender, "What kind of milk do you have?" The bartender looks confused and asks," Why would a cow want milk?" The cow replies,"I've been producing milk all my life and I've never had a chance to try it. I'd just like some milk." The bartender replies,"Okay we have whole milk, 2%, and skim milk. What'll you have?" The cow says,"Whole milk, I want the whole deal." The bartender obliges. Next the Lumberjack comes up to the bar. The bartender asks, "What'll you have?" The lumberjack asks for some syrup. The bartender inquiries,"What kind of syrup would you like?" The lumberjack answers,"Pure Maple, imitation, or chocolate. All work for me." The bartender turns and pours a shot of pure maple syrup and turns away. Finally the fireman walks up the the bartender and says, "Can I have a glass of water?" The bartender turn and ask inquisitively,"Why?" The fireman quickly replies,"TO PUT OUT THE FIRE!"...

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rape that shit

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whats worse than shitting in a urinal??? shitting in a shower

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What is worse than 20 black men stealing your TV? Having your family die in tragic car accident.

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What's worse than finding half a sticker in your apple Half a worm

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What is Kanye West's main goal in life? To crush the hopes and dreams of singing stars on national television, beginning with Taylor Swift.

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"One fish, two fish, red fish, the holocost." -Dr. Seuss

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A mexican Police officer walks into a crime scene. "Ouch." he exclaims, rubbing his forehead where a red bump is already surfacing.

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Why did Lady Gaga arrive at the Grammy's in an egg? Because she was born that way.

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(speaking to an orphan) knock, knock who's there not your parents

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What's white and flies around ? A seagull. What's black and flies around ? A seagull in the darkness.

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Yolo: Your Oppurtunity Lies Upon...... oh, wait upon starts with a u... YOLU

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Why did the black guy only turn left? Because he was mentally retarded and couldn't tell left from right and had no idea where he was going

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Write Your Own It's easy to take part, just type your text below!

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A Blonde, a Jew, a Rooster, and a Mexican walk into a bar and the bartender says, "What is this? Some kind of joke?"

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Why did the boy cross the road? He didn't he stopped and fapped.

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What happened to the man who dropped his soap? Nothing he picked it up and lived a happy life.

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your mumma so fat she stepped on the weight scales and it says to be continued

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What can't taste with a toung, and it's soul never dies? A shoe

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knock knock come in

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What is invisible, weighs 332 pounds, runs 67.3 mph, is green, and is made by Jews in China. Nothing, if something is invisible, then it cannot reflect green light, therefore it cannot be green.

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Why is the fat kid laying on the ground crying? Because I hit him with a shovel

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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