When a suicide-bomber when to heaven what did Allah give him apart from 72 virgins? 72 mothers in law.

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If your canoe is stuck in a tree, in the middle of august, with no headlights, how many pancakes does it take to get to the moon? A: None, snakes dont have armpits :D

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A choir boy is hit by a car outside church. Someone runs to him and says "shall I fetch the priest?" The boy starts to mumble something but quickly loses consciousness, and later dies after 16 hours in ICU.

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Why did the kid drop his lollipop? He got hit by a bus.

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An Hispanic married couple walked into a popular restaurant. The waiter arrived at their table and asked what they would like to eat. The husband ordered a steak and his wife ordered a salad. They both enjoyed their food, payed the bill and happily walked out of the restaurant.

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What's the difference between Micheal Phelps and Adolf Hitler. Michael Phelps is an Olympic swimmer who has won many gold medals in the 2008 Olympics in swimming races and is considered to be one of the greatest swimmers ever. Adolf Hitler was a terrible man who was the leader of the Nazi party during the World Wars. He ordered to kill eight million Jews, causing what is called the Holocaust. He is considered one of the worst men in human history. Other immature people would say Micheal Phelps can finish races.

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First person: Knock, knock. Second person: Who's there? First person: You know. Second person: 'You know' who? First person: O.O LORD VOLDEMORT!

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You know what is not cool? Fire.

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how did the thirteen year old girl get pregnant? she was raped.

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What's Donald Trump's favorite color?

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Why don't women know how to drive a car? Because there are no roads between the kitchen and the bedroom.

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Why couldn't little Sarah smell the roses? Her face was mauled by a grizzly bear

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Why did the golfer wear two pair of trousers? Because he's a wanker

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What's a cow's favorite vacation spot? the slaughterhouse.

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Knock Knock Who's there I have Alzheimer's I have Alzheimer's who? Knock Knock

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space is fun

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http://anti-joke.com/

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How do you confuse a person from France? By screaming in english at the sky while pionting at him.

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Why wasn't the rabbit elgible to vote? Because rabbits aren't human beings, and only humans are allowed to vote.

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Q: Why did the rich Wallstreet business man move into Harlem? A: Because sex offenders weren't welcome anywhere else.

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Why do Iraqi women never sleep with American soldiers? Because Americans always talk about pulling out but they never do!

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what's red and blue? your heart

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A 21 year old man walks into a bar with a vase of 12 roses. 57 years later he died after a lengthy battle with colon cancer.

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CHICKEN it is a chickenly chickeny food we eat WRONG

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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